Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ecilart

Search for a member

ecilart

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 104352
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

ecilart's page activity

Visits<b>HannaVega42</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 12:49am<b>Flendre_scarlet</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 9:29am<b>thewammy</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 11:34pm<b>Darkestsoul</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 8:54pm<b>FluffyHat</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 11:10pm<b>xXxhailstormxXx1</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 12:16am<b>DevilsAltair</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 8:56pm<b>angelofdestiny</b> - the 08/14/2009 at 2:39am<b>vlad82</b> - the 07/14/2009 at 11:58pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 07/14/2009 at 7:47pm<b>depinaariana</b> - the 06/12/2009 at 8:56pm<b>nokiac_b</b> - the 06/12/2009 at 6:45pm<b>pyromaniac239</b> - the 06/02/2009 at 12:12pm<b>annoyedwife5</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 3:39am<b>APrincess11</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 6:57pm<b>KPbIM</b> - the 05/22/2009 at 4:10am<b>Crummie</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 8:08pm<b>username666</b> - the 05/21/2009 at 5:38pm

ecilart's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

ecilart's favorite FMLs

Today, a man held a door open for me while I fished my umbrella out of my very cluttered bag. As I was opening my umbrella, I turned to thank him for being such a gentleman. Instead, a tampon that had apparently wedged itself into the folds of my umbrella flew into his face. FML

#4001107
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41004) - you deserved it (5289)

On 07/24/2009 at 7:39am - misc - by umbrella (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was in an elevator with my dad and several strangers. When the elevator voice said, "Going down," my dad excitedly said, "Man, I love it when she says that!" loudly enough for everyone to hear. FML

#4000566
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40170) - you deserved it (4162)

On 07/24/2009 at 6:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I am so hot, I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply "I didn't know you were into Pokémon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokémon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML

#3971030
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17119) - you deserved it (68315)

On 07/23/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by MitchFail (man) - United States

Today, I got very dressed up and was excited for my uncle's wedding. While standing in line for photos, I heard my dad's voice from behind me say "Who's the hot chick in the brown dress?" My uncle responds "Uh, that's your daughter." Silence. FML

#3967657
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69003) - you deserved it (4210)

On 07/23/2009 at 12:26am - misc - by Rory (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing pratically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML

#3950301
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75052) - you deserved it (6070)

On 07/22/2009 at 10:12am - intimacy - by Gordon (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boss sent out an email with the subject line "Urgent". He accidentally left the body of the email blank. I replied to all staff "You're firing blanks Peter". I later heard that his wife once got drunk and told everyone that they couldn't have kids because he has a low sperm count. FML

#3949208
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36507) - you deserved it (10041)

On 07/22/2009 at 4:16am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I had a fight with my little sister. Later she apologized and made me dinner to make up for it. I thought it was pretty good until I found out that instead of using Parmesan cheese in the recipe, she used foot shavings from her Ped Egg. FML

#3945236
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59329) - you deserved it (6263)

On 07/22/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by vomitingnow (man) - United States

Today, I was at the airport to catch a plane. It was very crowded at the gate and there was nowhere to sit except for a flat metal bench, so I sat on that. Turns out I was sitting on a luggage scale, so my weight was displayed for everybody to see. FML

#3921991
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17237) - you deserved it (41915)

On 07/21/2009 at 2:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had an important powerpoint presentation for ALL the big execs at work. It seems that during my lunch break, my boyfriend IMed me on my mac saying "Feeling so horny right now, come home for a quicky like last week?" I didn't see it until the presentation. So did the executives. FML

#3899297
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34183) - you deserved it (9246)

On 07/20/2009 at 3:07am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after work, I parked in the parking lot I go to every day to let heavy traffic go by. As I was about to leave, two cops suddenly yanked me out of the car and arrested me for "stocking," as they spelled it on the report. Some paranoid girl thought I was parking there every day to watch her. FML

Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were assigned partners for a History project so we were going to work on it at my house. When she asked me for directions, I told her I lived on Woodcock Road. She yelled slapped me and stormed off. I was serious. FML

#3894865
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50816) - you deserved it (2885)

On 07/20/2009 at 12:04am - love - by thicklysettled (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

#3866065
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27161) - you deserved it (59717)

On 07/18/2009 at 9:26pm - misc - by harrysolo (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after a night of partying, I woke up in the middle of my co-ed dorm lobby to the sound of giggles. I was in a thong with $1 monopoly bills sticking out. I'm a guy. FML

#3849129
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14141) - you deserved it (46187)

On 07/18/2009 at 2:03am - misc - by joedoe (man) - United States (California)

Today, it started raining unexpectedly. My daughter and I didn't have an umbrella, so my daughter raised one of my big flabby arms and put it over her head to protect her from the rain. It worked. FML

#3712266
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23281) - you deserved it (40589)

On 07/13/2009 at 7:30am - health - by letsloseweight (woman) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I was attempting to teach a bunch of 2nd and 5th graders on why it's so important to face your fears and try your best. It was going pretty well, until I was attacked by a pair of butterflies. I am afraid of butterflies - I ran away screaming like a little girl. FML

#3682423
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13473) - you deserved it (51628)

On 07/12/2009 at 12:35am - animals - by tryscal - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: