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I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I started rapping. I realized the room was not empty when, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joined in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22650) - you deserved it (32987)
On 05/21/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by crappingrapping - United States
Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45618) - you deserved it (3693)
On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML
I agree, your life sucks (44228) - you deserved it (6081)
On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)
Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53075) - you deserved it (2715)
On 05/03/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands
Today, I was tutoring a band member. Whenever I ask him to play a D or any D scale, he stops just to snicker and say, "Ha ha. D." He still sucks. I hate his guts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32925) - you deserved it (4558)
On 04/25/2013 at 3:55am - work - by justgivemethed - United States (California)
Today, I was sent to group therapy. A girl spent twenty minutes telling us horrible details of having been raised incestuously. A side effect of my new medication is yawning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37793) - you deserved it (2814)
On 04/24/2013 at 2:23am - health - by fiercehawk (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54562) - you deserved it (9168)
On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44667) - you deserved it (5214)
On 04/11/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40290) - you deserved it (7907)
On 04/10/2013 at 12:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I shaved my pubic area for my fiancé. He told me it looked "like Frodo tried to hack off Gandalf's beard with Gimli's ax." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32492) - you deserved it (7303)
On 04/08/2013 at 5:17am - intimacy - by dancekat (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12009) - you deserved it (44788)
On 04/07/2013 at 8:30pm - health - by maturity - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my boss threatened to fire me for killing him in Minecraft. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29760) - you deserved it (5480)
On 04/02/2013 at 6:30am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, the people fixing my phone called to say that for some reason, my phone's SIM card has wiped all my contacts except for four, and they are doing their best to try and recover the rest. I had to explain to them that I only had four contacts to begin with. The guy laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34050) - you deserved it (3730)
On 03/31/2013 at 3:00am - misc - by Mr.no contacts (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, while I was at work, I was on the verge of tears. My coworker asked what was wrong and I explained that I recently had to put my dog down. He then replied, "Cool story, bro. Tell it again." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31154) - you deserved it (420)
On 03/29/2013 at 4:23am - work - by CoolStoryBro -
Today, I was chatting with a co-worker, and she mentioned she has trouble swallowing pills. I replied that I'm lucky, because I have next to no gag reflex. Half the guys at the other registers abruptly went silent, and I'm now being constantly hit on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28577) - you deserved it (13572)
On 03/28/2013 at 4:56pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)
Friday 24 May 2013
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