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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 31 May 1987 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 15004
  • Number of comments : 189
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About drkwlf : I kick ass.

And there's only two things that need to be known. I hate U2. I hate Texans. If you're a U2 loving Texan, I hope you get set on fire and penetrated by overly-endowed bulls. Just sayin'.

drkwlf's page activity

Visits<b>Arestian</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 5:03am<b>yergenferfer</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 2:01am<b>TexanZaros</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 7:52pm<b>Chibster</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 3:00pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 9:21am<b>MrConfusion</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 11:27pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 10:54am<b>dannnngthatsux</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 4:54pm<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 11:41am<b>HoboRain</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 3:14pm<b>awkwardngrateful</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 9:12am<b>laxtax</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 3:25pm<b>NineeCat</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 5:48pm<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 3:14am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 6:35am<b>joshtapp</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 1:22pm<b>Vette90</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 2:22am<b>hilamonster06</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 12:48am

Fucked!<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 9:14am<b>joshtapp</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 7:22pm<b>brycewillis97</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 8:26pm

drkwlf's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

drkwlf's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, I brewed myself a fresh cup of coffee. I set the hot coffee onto my desk. My phone rang so I answered my coffee, spilling it all over my face and body. FML

by chris / 12/23/2009 at 1:42pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, while walking to work, I accidentally dropped my $400 cell phone on the sidewalk. The screen shattered into a million pieces. A woman passing by looked at the ruined phone and said, "Now that's what you call a dropped call!" She laughed and kept walking. FML

by Cellismasher / 11/04/2009 at 5:37pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML

by ohgod / 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Iowa) / Kids

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it I decided to whisper in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I hear behind me, "I am." FML

by unbelievable208 / 08/05/2009 at 1:28am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, it was my wedding day, and while I was standing next to my husband in front of all of our guests, I was rocking on my heels because I was nervous. I rocked too far and fell backward. My husband didn't come to help me up. He just said at the top of his lungs, "FAIL!" FML

by thefailure / 08/02/2009 at 12:21am / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML

by fmysexlife / 07/27/2009 at 1:06am / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up from the worst nightmare I've ever had. After tearfully explaining to my boyfriend, in detail, how bad this dream was, he told me to "put on my big girl panties" and make him breakfast. FML

by vanguardwiley / 07/24/2009 at 2:40am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my girlfriend, who never initiates sex, pulled me into my room and onto my bed with kisses and other seductive behavior. As I'm thinking about how awesome it is that's she's doing this for once, she reaches down, grabs my underwear, and gives me the worst wedgie I've ever received. FML

by robinhoood / 07/12/2009 at 1:38am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had to go through the embarrassment and pain of telling my parents I was pregnant. I took the test and it came out positive and I was freaking out. I got grounded for the rest of the year and they're really disappointed in me. Five minutes ago, I got my period. FML

by Anonymous / 07/11/2009 at 9:26pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous