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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my sixteen year old son told me that he's following his guidance counselor's advice: to do what his hero does for a living. The problem? His hero is SpongeBob Squarepants. His ambition in life is to become a fry cook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18284) - you deserved it (2912)
On 11/07/2010 at 3:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was ambushed by a very angry beaver. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19963) - you deserved it (3616)
On 11/05/2010 at 5:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, I discovered our AOL billing information. Turns out we've been paying for dial-up via automatic bill paying that we thought we cancelled in 2000. $1,800 later, we called to cancel. Customer service congratulated us on being loyal members for over 13 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13096) - you deserved it (18851)
On 08/02/2010 at 1:23pm - money - by Jay (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was proposed to in a McDonald's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48550) - you deserved it (9806)
On 03/16/2010 at 6:55am - love - by hater -
Today, after finishing the laundry, I took clothes out of the dryer and took a big whiff of their delicious clean scent. That was when I noticed that my mom was watching me, and I had just smelled my dad's still-stained underwear that was on top. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16013) - you deserved it (7175)
On 03/13/2010 at 2:32pm - misc - by smellsgood (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I spent all day and last night in the bathroom. The seafood I'd been keeping in the refrigerator apparently had gone bad, and is now intent on finding its every possible route to the Great Porcelain Whirlpool. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10550) - you deserved it (5341)
On 03/12/2010 at 4:44pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)
Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34155) - you deserved it (7049)
On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27356) - you deserved it (2270)
On 02/13/2010 at 11:08am - animals - by Dog fart - United States
Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5290) - you deserved it (39731)
On 12/31/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28101) - you deserved it (2314)
On 12/29/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by sickofsick - United States
Today, my boyfriend got rejected by his dream college. In an effort to comfort him, I told him that he is incredibly smart and that it's their loss. He replied, "Of course you think so, you're an idiot!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (22160) - you deserved it (3155)
On 12/24/2009 at 6:41pm - misc - by imamonster1992 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, at work, I went to fold a pair of pants that was left in a changing room to find out that someone had taken a dump in them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25159) - you deserved it (1456)
On 12/10/2009 at 12:24am - work - by g_unit (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, while flying on American Airlines back from visiting family, a new born puked its breakfast all over my HP mini, knocked my orange juice ino my lap, and than coughed up another layer on top of it all. I couldn't change my pants because of we were about to experience turbulance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27625) - you deserved it (1791)
On 11/30/2009 at 1:34am - kids - by coloradoman (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30377) - you deserved it (2053)
On 11/24/2009 at 6:44am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I totalled my car. I flipped it over on the freeway and broke my collarbone in the process. I was in extreme pain and unable to move. It took the ambulance an hour to get there in rush hour traffic. The song repeating on my iPod was, "Don't Worry, be Happy." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28938) - you deserved it (3665)
On 11/04/2009 at 12:18am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
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