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An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
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100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Today, I learned that in Japan there are monkeys that wait tables and work at a tavern. Literally, I have a job a monkey can do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22585) - you deserved it (3965)
On 03/16/2010 at 11:30am - work - by slickboy0023 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I have to spend over an hour at a Gamestop so my boyfriend can get his 'Final Fantasy' game at midnight. I'm tired, I don't want to stand around any more, and all the people around around me are debating super heroes. I'm living in an episode of 'The Big Bang Theory.' FML
I agree, your life sucks (8304) - you deserved it (24102)
On 03/09/2010 at 12:12am - misc - by notanerd - United States
Today, I went to Starbucks to use the bathroom. After I knocked on the door, and turned the handle, this little old lady rips the door open and goes "I WAS TAKING A DUMP. YOU WANNA COME IN AND WIPE MY SHIT? DO YOU?!" and then continued to ask me the same question for five minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20542) - you deserved it (2794)
On 03/06/2010 at 9:38pm - misc - by bathroomblunder (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, my wife came home drunk, telling me all about this amazing man she met at the club with her friends, and how she wanted to have sex with him but couldn't because she was on her period. What a present. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19321) - you deserved it (1677)
On 02/14/2010 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42849) - you deserved it (6382)
On 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate for the first time. He was sucking on my boob, everything was going good. He suddenly stopped and started choking really bad. He thought milk was coming out. Turns out, it was just his gum. The moment was ruined. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13604) - you deserved it (2214)
On 01/05/2010 at 11:22am - intimacy - by me (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen straight onto my ass, but thankfully my testicles broke my fall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30286) - you deserved it (2028)
On 01/04/2010 at 8:34am - health - by Soresack (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my 8 year-old niece and I were arguing over how many letters were in the alphabet. Guess who was right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4639) - you deserved it (37831)
On 01/03/2010 at 1:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20658) - you deserved it (5207)
On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, it's decided, I'm going on diet. For real. But I said that yesterday. And the day before. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6202) - you deserved it (39747)
On 11/29/2009 at 8:02am - health - by Numnum (woman) - United Kingdom (Greater London)
Today, I learned that as adorable as it might be to watch your cat follow your cursor around the screen, the humor ends when she dives into and breaks the monitor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7449) - you deserved it (19805)
On 11/26/2009 at 4:22am - animals - by MouseChaser (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was feeling a little racy and decided to send my boyfriend some naked pictures of myself. He responded, "That's OK, but does your face have to be in them?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (14450) - you deserved it (3034)
On 11/23/2009 at 12:07am - intimacy - by denise (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, since we hadn't be romantic for a while, I shaved, bathed, cut my hair and snuggled naked up to my husband in bed. He got up went to the computer, masturbated to porn, came back to bed and asked me what was for breakfast. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20829) - you deserved it (2855)
On 11/20/2009 at 1:41pm - intimacy - by Inkabadger (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, as I left class I felt a tug on my rucksack from behind. Thinking it was just someone deliberately dragging me back, I struggled to let myself free and shouted "Let go!". I looked over my shoulder just to find that one the straps was trapped in the doorhandle. Everyone was in hysterics. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7325) - you deserved it (2667)
On 11/19/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by betamaxjim (man) - United Kingdom (Kirklees)
Today, I was at a party where I ate bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14771) - you deserved it (23756)
On 11/14/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by swedishdude (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)
Monday 17 June 2013
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