Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

djskype

Search for a member

djskype

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3627
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

djskype's page activity

Visits<b>possesed0ne</b> - the 09/26/2009 at 8:54pm<b>username666</b> - the 04/25/2009 at 10:02pm

djskype's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

djskype's favorite FMLs

Today, I told the man I love to "go first" when we started talking at the same time. I wanted to confess my feelings, he wanted to tell me about his engagement. FML

#1517
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21942) - you deserved it (1870)

On 01/17/2009 at 9:55pm - love - by biblio - United States (Texas)

Today, I posted a question on a forum asking if my week old nipple piercing would get hooked on anything easily. People assured me that it would be fine. An hour later I had to climb over a wall to get something and in lowering myself down I forgot about it and dragged my nipple along the wall. FML

#1510
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6458) - you deserved it (23456)

On 01/17/2009 at 8:48pm - misc - by jdot747 - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, the guy I've had a crush on for a while called me and asked me over. I took a cab to his place and when I got there he was dressed in leather and wore a mask... It took me a 20 dollar cab fare to realize my crush is a freak. FML

#1507
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30290) - you deserved it (6452)

On 01/17/2009 at 8:38pm - intimacy - by Allenburg - United States (California)

Today, my mother asked a woman at the clothing store we go to all the time when her baby was due. Turns out the woman isn't pregnant. FML

#1439
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14252) - you deserved it (4373)

On 01/17/2009 at 9:11am - misc - by BobbyMalone - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to an underwear shop, and an employee recommended me a push-up bra. I was wearing one. FML

#1427
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20944) - you deserved it (1988)

On 01/17/2009 at 6:31am - misc - by Pakundo - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was late for work and took a taxi. The driver tells me he tried to commit suicide recently. I listen to him for 20mins, sat outside my workplace with the meter off. He charges me £5.80 and my boss gives me a warning for being late. FML

#1315
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16989) - you deserved it (2646)

On 01/16/2009 at 2:27am - work - by hapless - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I reached for my beer and took a huge swallow before I realized that I had picked up my friend's tobacco spit cup. "Vomit" is not a strong enough word to describe what happened next. FML

#1314
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22048) - you deserved it (5134)

On 01/15/2009 at 11:57pm - misc - by blegh - Switzerland (Ticino)

Today, I daringly tried that fish-bath thing, where all these fish come and eat all of your skin's dead cells. I got into it, and after 15 minutes of being a human buffet, at least 20 of the fish died. FML

#1305
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31012) - you deserved it (5698)

On 01/15/2009 at 8:25pm - health - by anx133 - China (Shanghai)

Today, I was hanging out with a couple of friends and one of them tells a funny story about how he filled a condom with syrup and put it in his friend's mouth while he was asleep. Me with my big mouth starts to say, "Condoms taste na--" and stopped myself as everyone started laughing at me. FML

#1302
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5479) - you deserved it (22206)

On 01/15/2009 at 7:39pm - misc - by jen - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I found my car completely vandalized when I came home from work. A paper on the seat read "That's for what you did to Hannah you fuck". Hannah? FML

#1295
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31919) - you deserved it (1591)

On 01/15/2009 at 6:32pm - love - by Camm. - United States (New York)

Today, I realized I spend way too much time on the computer. I grabbed the menu at the restaurant, glanced at the page, and tried to do CTRL+F to find seafood. Geek coming through! FML

#1196
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6843) - you deserved it (24175)

On 01/15/2009 at 6:14am - love - by Hth - United States (Delaware)

Today, a co-worker asked me if I had a comb he could borrow. I'm bald. FML

#1114
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20830) - you deserved it (2240)

On 01/14/2009 at 10:32am - love - by poisonhand - United States (Michigan)

Today, my mom asked all the old ladies in her church to pray that I meet "someone special". FML

#1104
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19795) - you deserved it (1747)

On 01/14/2009 at 9:26am - love - by beekie9 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was having a cybersex chat with a "girl" on a website whilst at work. I noticed my colleague who sits next to me start cracking up with laughter. Turned out it was him I was chatting with and he was winding me up. Worst thing is it had given me a stiffy. FML

#1065
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10380) - you deserved it (47136)

On 01/14/2009 at 3:49am - intimacy - by diddlysquat - United Kingdom (Wakefield)

Today, I threw a rock in the air and watched it soar. And watched it come back down and hit me in the face. Gravity. FML

#1028
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5774) - you deserved it (44482)

On 01/13/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by Gale - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: