[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?
Email notification?

definecrazy

Search for a member

definecrazy
  • Town/Country : Singapore
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 10 January 1996 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 7355
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

definecrazy's last visitors

definecrazy's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

definecrazy's favorite FMLs

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend when we started messing around. Things were getting really hot when he gets a call from his best friend whose grandfather had just died. As they were talking and I heard her crying, he unzips his pants and mouths, "She won't know." FML

#1404603 (214)

I agree, your life sucks (56112) - you deserved it (5120)

On 04/27/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to throw me against the wall and kiss me like they do in the movies. Being all aggressive and smooth, he grabs my shirt and pushes me. He pushed a little too hard and my head was thrown back into the wall. I was knocked out for ten minutes. FML

#1401975 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (56836) - you deserved it (4336)

On 04/27/2009 at 7:15pm - intimacy - by tara22 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend of two years, who is a fabulous guitarist and singer, told me he wrote me a song. I was so excited. Turns out it was a break up song. FML

#1399527 (80)

I agree, your life sucks (50057) - you deserved it (2604)

On 04/27/2009 at 5:47pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went on somewhat of a blind date. The date was OK until he tried to spoon feed me. This didn't go over so well. Later, I noticed a strange looking brief case he was carrying. I asked him what it was and he whipped out 5 yoyos and did a yoyo show in the middle of the restaurant. FML

#1214403 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (50595) - you deserved it (4433)

On 04/22/2009 at 1:24am - misc - by 11321 (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was on top of my boyfriend having sex and I was looking away doing my thing. When I looked back, my boyfriend had headphones on and was playing air drums. FML

#1192278 (236)

I agree, your life sucks (61219) - you deserved it (11958)

On 04/21/2009 at 1:37pm - intimacy - by BerryRockstar (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was masturbating to a video a friend sent me. The girls were hot, walking out on a stage doing all sorts of sexy manuevers. The video was close to ending and the announcer in the video announced the winner. His name was Dan. It was a drag competition. My friend knew I'd whack off to it. FML

#1097922 (216)

I agree, your life sucks (19761) - you deserved it (86637)

On 04/18/2009 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by Masterbater (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

#761206 (480)

I agree, your life sucks (167985) - you deserved it (51071)

On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, for April fools I decided to set off the smoke detectors in my friends apartment while he was sleeping and saran wrap the outside of his bedroom doorway so he would smack into it. Instead, he jumped out the window and broke his leg. FML

#748414 (246)

I agree, your life sucks (13041) - you deserved it (78510)

On 04/01/2009 at 4:06pm - health - by nic (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my parents punished me and made me wash my mouth out with soap for cursing. I'm almost 19. I said the word "hell". FML

#703894 (292)

I agree, your life sucks (126031) - you deserved it (18030)

On 03/30/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by jdsksoapy (woman) - United States

Today, I volunteered at a nursing home. I approached a lonely, old man who had a type of nervous tick. I went over to speak to him, and not even four sentences into our conversation he says, "I'd really like to make love to you." What I thought was a tick was actually him stroking himself. FML

#697390 (103)

I agree, your life sucks (54665) - you deserved it (2829)

On 03/30/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was going to a stoplight party. Green shirt=single, yellow=hard to get and red=taken. I show up wearing a red shirt and I see my boyfriend in a green shirt. Thinking it was a mistake I ask him jokingly why he isnt wearing red. He looks at me weird and says "Oh... you didnt get my text?" FML

#642666 (117)

I agree, your life sucks (79876) - you deserved it (3202)

On 03/27/2009 at 12:47pm - misc - by 1234567898765432 - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend came over for dinner, but couldn't eat because he had just gotten his tongue pierced. My grandpa heard this, winked at my boyfriend and said "Can't eat now, but I bet that's all you'll be doing in a few weeks..." My super protective father was sitting right next to him. FML

#572670 (178)

I agree, your life sucks (66788) - you deserved it (6653)

On 03/24/2009 at 6:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227 (490)

I agree, your life sucks (154545) - you deserved it (18178)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)