defferwa

Search for a member

defferwa

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 January 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4786
  • Number of comments : 43
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 25 posted

About defferwa : I'm awesome

defferwa's page activity

Visits<b>Timmip12</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 9:55am<b>lushgum</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 12:38pm<b>iain0910</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 9:21am<b>Loewe90</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 12:23pm<b>jenniferwoods41</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 9:11pm<b>rustydiamonds</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 12:56pm<b>jarrettd</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 7:44pm<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 1:25am<b>Lauren324</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 4:03pm<b>get428</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 7:05am<b>xXHollowIchigoXx</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 11:15pm<b>theawkwardlife</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 10:50pm<b>XistingPrince</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 10:49pm<b>neeena94</b> - the 02/12/2013 at 2:37am<b>masaega222</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 5:35am<b>xlord</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 7:33pm<b>lildevilpiggy</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 6:59pm<b>SinfulTragedy</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 4:42pm

defferwa's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of defferwa's badges

defferwa's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home to an eviction notice after an apartment inspection. The reason? Having an unauthorized pet that could cause unnecessary damage to my suite. My pet is a goldfish. FML

by goldfish / 03/05/2012 at 9:47pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals

Today, after a nice swim at the local pool, I ran into a naked girl in the showers. She screamed, kicked me in the nuts and ran off. I still have no clue what she was doing in the men's shower room. FML

by ouch / 02/29/2012 at 2:18pm / Italy (Emilia-Romagna) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend said I could only take her virginity while I have a flaccid penis, so I won't hurt her. I get hard from just staring at her covered ass. FML

by Anonymous / 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I set my alarm half-an-hour earlier so I could masturbate. That's how horny and single I am. FML

by desperate905 / 02/21/2012 at 3:10am / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Intimacy

Today, I overheard my fourteen year old daughter talking on the phone. Apparently, as of last night, she and her best friend have their "official licenses in muff diving". FML

by Gavin / 02/20/2012 at 4:19pm / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Intimacy

Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML

by Illinoisgirl / 02/14/2012 at 9:29am / Hungary (Budapest) / Love

Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML

by Alyssa / 02/12/2012 at 7:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to make a doctor's appointment for my daughter. Apparently she thought it would be better to wipe herself with Clorox tough scrub disinfecting wipes than tell me she'd caught an STD. FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2012 at 5:03pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

Today, I went to the gas station, paid the clerk, and drove off without pumping any gas. FML

by ChevRooon / 01/26/2012 at 11:46pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I didn't have plans on shaving my pubic hair. My girlfriend's braces thought otherwise. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2012 at 3:22pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I waited on an elderly man whose wife had just left him. After him going on and on about how his dog will love his leftover chicken, I nervously caught a case of verbal diarrhea and uttered, "Well, if there's chicken involved, I'll get on my knees and be your dog." FML

by Anonymous / 01/23/2012 at 12:12am / United States / Work

Today, my boyfriend referred to his penis as 'The Eye of Sauron'. It didn't help when he pulled down his foreskin, pointed it in my direction and said 'I see you'. FML

by anon / 01/18/2012 at 1:29pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Afterwards, he said he was in love with me and that he wants to be with me forever. It was also at this time I realised that I can't stand him. FML

by Anonymous / 01/09/2012 at 10:30pm / Australia / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML

by Cpt Colin / 01/03/2012 at 2:17am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I got circumcised by my girlfriend's braces. FML

by nickthetank / 12/31/2011 at 4:21am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy