Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

deedoubles

Offline (the 12/21/2014 at 11:26pm) | Search for a member

deedoubles

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2128
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

deedoubles's page activity

Visits<b>BBlah</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 1:29pm<b>antoniasiddall</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 9:14am<b>Makaze</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 11:10pm<b>tannara</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 1:51pm<b>ifhydomo23</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 12:25pm<b>Mizzesbestie</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 10:54pm<b>ErictheRed</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 3:37pm

deedoubles's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of deedoubles's badges

deedoubles's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my boyfriend about my upcoming mouth surgery. He freaked out. Not because he's worried about me, but because I told him I will not be able to give him head for two weeks. FML

Today, I went to buy a birthday present for my boyfriend. While buying him a sweater, the cashier tried to up-sale me by asking if my boyfriend wore briefs or boxers, because both were on sale. Not thinking, I blurted out, "I don't know, they just come off." FML

#20477493
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25738) - you deserved it (12363)

On 01/25/2013 at 12:31am - misc - by awkwardturtle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

#20466884
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35665) - you deserved it (3477)

On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States

Today, my husband sent me a text before heading home from work. All it said was, "Need a fuck. Backed up to hell. You're about to shower face first in a fire hydrant." Love you too, hun. FML

#20466497
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31347) - you deserved it (5378)

On 01/18/2013 at 3:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to go to a UV-light party dressed all in white. Before leaving, my little brother dumped a glass of tomato juice over my head saying, "Now you look just like a used tampon!" FML

#20456974
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38431) - you deserved it (4816)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by Mary - Czech Republic

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend on the bathroom floor, I felt something tickle my balls. I looked back to see her sister's kitten getting in on the action. I think I just had my first threesome. FML

#20456674
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46478) - you deserved it (7941)

On 01/13/2013 at 3:53am - intimacy - by Drewbie (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out that my son told my daughter at some point that "real" name for Hershey's Kisses is "blowjobs." I found this out because at kindergarten she was asked what her favorite food was. The teacher wasn't happy when she called me. FML

#20452458
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32046) - you deserved it (2725)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:51pm - kids - by Grant - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a year asked me to move in with him. I would have been touched at this gesture, had he not asked in the form of a text message, saying: "Got kicked out. Wanna get a flat or something?" FML

#20447722
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29622) - you deserved it (3560)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:31am - love - by movingbuddy (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went out to meet a wonderful woman I'd chatted with online. I did have a few fears about if she was really just some guy trying to make a fool out of me. When I met her, she really was a girl, and was happy to see me. Problem: she was actually 13. I'm 34. FML

#20444863
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26521) - you deserved it (8041)

On 01/06/2013 at 12:24pm - love - by lifsabtch (man) -

Today, I was having sex with my new boyfriend, and I realized that he enjoys making airplane sound effects while inserting himself inside of me. Moment ruined. FML

#20443434
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30452) - you deserved it (5210)

On 01/05/2013 at 4:21am - intimacy - by kblevss (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to church for the first time in my life. They had a Jesus statue at the altar, and I noticed he was surprisingly muscular. Ten minutes later, I had to excuse myself, after I caught myself fantasizing over a crucified Jesus. FML

#20432015
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10197) - you deserved it (34591)

On 12/30/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by Weirdo (woman) - United States

Today, I set up a spy cam in my room to find out which one of my pervy brothers has been using my computer to watch porn. Turns out it was actually my father. I now have a video of him sitting in my chair masturbating, and I can't get it out of my head. FML

#20427916
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43606) - you deserved it (10730)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Malaysia (Selangor)

Today, while sharing a few beers on the couch with my boyfriend, he drunkenly uttered the fateful words, "Babe, if I could suck my own dick, you'd be single as HELL." FML

#20426492
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52763) - you deserved it (7175)

On 12/27/2012 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by well, i am now (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML

#20423697
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50566) - you deserved it (3539)

On 12/26/2012 at 2:30pm - misc - by gaggin - United States (California)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: