decko44

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decko44

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 April 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7361
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About decko44 : If you can read this STOP BEING A CREEPER!!! OR I WILL KILL YOU!!!

decko44's page activity

Visits<b>sylveon</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 7:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 8:47am<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 5:24am<b>umadbromad</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 11:44pm<b>StarWolf111</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 1:02pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 07/29/2011 at 5:12pm

Fucked!<b>umadbromad</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 4:44am

decko44's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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decko44's favorite FMLs

Today, I was lying on the sofa when the phone rang. I jumped up to answer in time. I knocked over my laptop, and kicked my guitar into a glass causing it to smash. It was a wrong number. FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2011 at 3:43pm / Isle of Man / Miscellaneous

Today, on the train, I was bitten by a homeless man. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2010 at 2:03am / United States / Transportation

Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go fuck myself. FML

by painfulintercourse / 11/22/2010 at 2:36pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, while on the bus, I began to fall asleep. Suddenly, a man next to me started laughing very loudly, scaring me and jolting me out from my nap. I was so scared, I reflexively punched the girl in front of me in the face. I was pinned down by three other men while the cops were called. FML

by snoozlagist / 10/30/2010 at 12:52am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend and my parents staged an intervention, and have asked me to go to rehab. What they want me to go to rehab for? World of Warcraft. FML

by leve80paladin / 10/25/2010 at 11:06am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, after my marching band's performance, the girls had to change out of our uniforms in a very dark school bathroom. Someone turned on the lights and I realized that more than a dozen roaches had crawled into my skinny jeans. FML

by toazt / 10/10/2010 at 4:45am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally decided to do regular biology rather than honors biology, thinking honors would be too hard. My first day in regular biology, my lab partner asked me whether a rock was alive or not. FML

by shelbs61 / 08/30/2010 at 3:55pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I came home to a dead fish duct-taped to the wall of my dorm room. I can't reach it. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2010 at 7:05pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I ordered pizza and watched a movie. After dinner we started to make out. I began to take my clothes off when he stopped me. He said that sex is exercise and you can't exercise for 30 minutes after eating. FML

by oumalina / 08/11/2010 at 9:54pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while in bed, my nose became runny. Being as tired as I was, I decided to ignore it until the morning. Turns out it was a nose bleed, and my pillowcase is ruined. FML

by RustyGuy / 03/05/2010 at 1:31pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I tried to see if you can kick yourself in the nuts. You can. FML

by nutcracker / 02/23/2010 at 4:28am / Slovenia (Bohinj) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that you can get arrested for holding up a 'free hugs' sign. FML

by nonameLiz / 02/02/2010 at 8:16pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that you can get arrested for holding up a 'free hugs' sign. FML

by nonameLiz / 02/02/2010 at 8:16pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a new laptop for Christmas. The picture on the box showed a woman balancing it on one finger to show how light it was, so I tried it myself. I dropped my laptop, breaking the hard drive and putting a massive crack down the screen. FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2009 at 7:43am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, after having paid to download an iPhone FML app, I found out that the real 'Fmylife Official' app was a lot more complete. And free. FML

by Fmyapp / 12/02/2009 at 12:58pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous