decko44

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decko44

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 April 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7731
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About decko44 : If you can read this STOP BEING A CREEPER!!! OR I WILL KILL YOU!!!

decko44's page activity

Visits<b>sylveon</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 7:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 8:47am<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 5:24am<b>umadbromad</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 11:44pm<b>StarWolf111</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 1:02pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 07/29/2011 at 5:12pm

Fucked!<b>umadbromad</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 4:44am

decko44's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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decko44's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting at the computer browsing various websites. In my attempt to scoot the chair forward, I hit my knee against the desk that my computer was on, and ended up breaking it. I literally broke my knee sitting on my ass. FML

by Charles / 06/21/2011 at 12:59pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, while I was delivering pizza in the torrential downpour, I waited 5 minutes in the pouring rain for an old lady to dig 20 bucks out of her purse. Her total was $19.99. She told me to keep the change and make lots of money. FML

by micheal / 06/21/2011 at 12:52pm / United States / Work

Today, my back hurt really badly, so I decided to stay in bed. After a while, I sat up to shut the door. When I leaned over to reach it, I fell off my bed and face-planted the floor. After picking myself up and getting comfortable in my bed again, I realized the door was still open. FML

by no one / 06/19/2011 at 2:46pm / United States (Mississippi) / Health

Today, my son's homework was to write a story about what he wants to be when he grows up. He wrote that he plans on being unemployed and living at home until we throw him out, then he'll live under a bridge. He's only 12, but already planning for a future as an unemployed bum. FML

by Seriously / 06/15/2011 at 12:46pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML

by ugh / 06/14/2011 at 1:56pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my new iPhone was stolen from my school locker. After canceling my service, sobbing, having my mom yell at the secretary for their lack of security and finally agreeing to change to a private school, I found it in the corner of my locker. FML

by Anonymous / 06/09/2011 at 7:02pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my mom has notebooks with lists of everything she has bought for me ever since I was born. Apparently she is going to make me pay her back for all the money she spent on me once I'm an adult. FML

by Anonymous / 06/08/2011 at 12:35am / United States (California) / Money

Today, my boss's cat died. I'm expected to attend the service. FML

by whymyliferose / 06/03/2011 at 12:47am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I was complimented on my hat by two different people. I wasn't wearing a hat. FML

by AndieApocalypse / 06/03/2011 at 12:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave my husband an ultimatum: either he could have sex with me or play Minecraft. Needless to say, he spent the rest of the evening playing Minecraft. FML

by minecraftwilldie / 06/02/2011 at 12:52pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I was sitting with my crush at lunch. Trying to flirt, I tried to stare seductively into his eyes while sucking on my straw. I missed. The straw shot straight up my nose, causing me the worst nose bleed of my life. FML

by littlegirl / 05/07/2011 at 12:46am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, my dog had to choose between protecting me from a mugger or eating an apple. He chose the apple. FML

by mugged / 03/20/2011 at 4:29pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML

by Almostfunny / 03/16/2011 at 9:01am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, my Dad thought "Joseph" and "Francis" were two people hacking our internet. They are actually the names of my laptop and iPod, which have now been blocked from using our modem. He can't figure out how to unblock them. FML

by Gem / 02/11/2011 at 5:59am / Australia (Victoria) / Geek

Today, I discovered my parents have spent my college fund because "2012 will happen" before I graduate. FML

by skyhigh / 01/13/2011 at 12:48am / United States (Texas) / Money