decko44

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decko44

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 11 April 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7686
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About decko44 : If you can read this STOP BEING A CREEPER!!! OR I WILL KILL YOU!!!

decko44's page activity

Visits<b>sylveon</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 7:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 8:47am<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 5:24am<b>umadbromad</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 11:44pm<b>StarWolf111</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 1:02pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 07/29/2011 at 5:12pm

Fucked!<b>umadbromad</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 4:44am

decko44's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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decko44's favorite FMLs

Today, a truck rear-ended my car and drove off. I could see everything from my office, everything except his license plate. FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2012 at 8:43am / Norway / Transportation

Today, I was apparently tired enough to spray silly string under my armpits rather than deodorant. FML

by ParkerRommel / 01/26/2012 at 10:22pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it's -20°C outside. Half way through my thirty minutes walk to work, my boss pulled up beside me in her car, said "You look cold. I'll see you at work." And then drove away. FML

by emma209 / 01/24/2012 at 1:07pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I was driving back home with my family. I had to sit quietly for half an hour, all while pretending I didn't notice my sister playing with herself under the coat on her lap. FML

by jjs51 / 01/23/2012 at 5:36pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I woke up to the sound of a Suburban crashing through my fence and striking the tree in my front yard. After filling out the police report, the driver repeatedly asked me to give him a lift to work. He seemed confused by my speechlessness. FML

by Anonymous / 01/22/2012 at 12:57pm / United States (Nevada) / Transportation

Today, while riding back from a weekend away with my boyfriend, we crashed his motorbike, resulting in us getting thrown over a barbed wire fence into a forest. I woke up in hospital. Apparently, in his adrenaline rush, he climbed back on his bike and continued his trip, forgetting all about me. FML

by superficialheart / 01/21/2012 at 6:59am / China / Transportation

Today, my school's 6'2, 270-pound, 375-pound bench-pressing football superstar knocked me unconscious in one hit. With a dodgeball. FML

by Shameful / 01/18/2012 at 2:57pm / United States (Alabama) / Health

Today, my teacher, who's Irish, called me insensitive and stupid for imitating her accent. I'm Filipino and my parents immigrated to Ireland where I was born, and then we moved to Canada when I was 14. Her response to my explanation? "Bullshit." FML

by meh / 01/18/2012 at 12:21am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, when I excitedly announced to my mother-in-law that I was pregnant, she looked at me with a blank expression and asked me who the father was. She's 45. She's not senile or suffering from dementia, but apparently just suffering from being a chronic bitch. FML

by littlelottie / 01/17/2012 at 12:04pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a Facebook message from the school genius/nerd, who I have never talked to. He politely informed me that after much thought and deliberation, he has narrowed it down to who his ideal mate is. Me. FML

by geeklove / 01/15/2012 at 10:30pm / United States (North Carolina) / Geek

Today, I had to slowly explain to my daughter why her Facebook profile isn't a valid piece of ID. FML

by Ange / 01/15/2012 at 2:34pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids

Today, while I was peacefully sleeping, I felt a hand suddenly slap my forehead. Then fingers began to press against my mouth, then nose, then eyes. I finally woke up to my girlfriend laughing hysterically. She'd confused me with her clock-radio. FML

by Vitriol / 01/15/2012 at 1:14pm / France / Love

Today, I was walking to the bus stop when someone slapped an innocent person in the face with a fish. I was that innocent person. FML

by lolwtfbbq444 / 01/15/2012 at 5:24am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, this girl I liked made her Facebook status "Nobody texts me anymore, message me numbers?" I commented that I texted her. She deleted it and changed it to "Nobody that I care about texts me anymore, message me numbers?" FML

by Anonymous / 01/15/2012 at 1:24am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I walked in on my sister sitting on the toilet, trying to use "The Force" to pull over the toilet paper roll sitting on the sink. FML

by 2gewd4u / 01/14/2012 at 8:24pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous