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ddavong

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  • Number of visits : 768
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ddavong's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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ddavong's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a run with my crush. She expressed how happy she was to have a decent running partner, because the last one kept complaining he thought he might throw up. We got to the top of the hill and I puked right in front of her. FML

#20463224
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32557) - you deserved it (4101)

On 01/16/2013 at 7:53pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

#20462136
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36556) - you deserved it (3835)

On 01/16/2013 at 2:52am - misc - by WTF (man) -

Today, I was the last person in line for going on the bus. Incidentally, I was right behind a guy way taller and wider than me. When he got on the bus, the bus driver immediately shut the door behind him. I was left outside chasing after the bus. FML

#20462065
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30890) - you deserved it (2037)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, my mother-in-law gave me a bottle of champagne for my birthday. This is the third year in a row she has done this. I'm a recovering alcoholic, and she's well aware of that fact. FML

#20462057
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37126) - you deserved it (2752)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:36am - health - by Ari (woman) -

Today, after a long, horrible day at work and some fighting with my family and my girlfriend, I decided to cheer myself up by going to McDonald's for a change. I burst into tears when the cashier told me they couldn't make me a Mars McFlurry because they'd run out of ingredients. FML

#20460946
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35756) - you deserved it (7829)

On 01/15/2013 at 3:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

#20460771
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41142) - you deserved it (7190)

On 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm - love - by Bella (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML

#20460540
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40818) - you deserved it (4256)

On 01/15/2013 at 9:41am - kids - by Nightmare (woman) -

Today, one of my paintings was accepted into a local art gallery. It would've been a dream come true, had my "best friend" not submitted it under her own name and taken all the credit. FML

#20453750
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37617) - you deserved it (2625)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my 17 year old boyfriend's mother bought him a giraffe onesie. He refused to take it off and insisted on wearing it everywhere we go. We live in Australia and it's our summer now. So far he has passed out 3 times in public because he over heated, but he still won't take it off. FML

#20453308
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39491) - you deserved it (6389)

On 01/11/2013 at 6:36am - love - by GiraffeLover - Australia

Today, I discovered after 11 months, my girlfriend is finally ready to have sex. I discovered this by walking in on her and one of my friends. FML

#20448085
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56053) - you deserved it (4240)

On 01/08/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by finallyready (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I started charging my phone in the car during a family road trip. The car recognized my iPhone as an MP3 player and started playing the audio from the porn video I watched before we left. Everybody heard. FML

#20443608
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10489) - you deserved it (38921)

On 01/05/2013 at 11:16am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML

#20427288
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35868) - you deserved it (5069)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:49am - misc - by Ren - United States (Ohio)

Today, my estranged mother texted me saying, "Gran died, LOL." My grandmother and I were fairly close, so I was shocked and disgusted. I gave her the benefit of the doubt and asked if she knew what "LOL" meant. She did. FML

#20088350
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28690) - you deserved it (1562)

On 09/25/2012 at 5:28pm - misc - by burn in hell (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, a stranger called me, saying I look hot in the bra I was wearing. When I hung up, thinking it was a joke, I opened the back door, and saw a man running away from my backyard. FML

#20079219
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28972) - you deserved it (1889)

On 09/19/2012 at 1:02pm - misc - by jitiizer (woman) - Netherlands (Friesland)

Today, while attempting the Italian Chandelier with my girlfriend, I heard a popping noise, and then had a sharp pain in my dick. Turns out I "broke" it. Instead of calling 911 immediately, my girlfriend remarked how my now black and blue penis looked like a Smurf. FML

#20003323
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27526) - you deserved it (5845)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)



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