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dazzle_me_lovely's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 05/11/2011 at 1:48am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
Today, my husband told me that he's letting his mother move in with us. He told her it was alright without even consulting me first. I hate my mother-in-law so much that I'm contemplating divorce rather than living with her. FML
by kayt240 / 05/04/2011 at 1:41am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had some hot phone sex with my long-distance girlfriend. Half-way through, my mom stormed in, and told me I was disgusting and sick for doing it in the same room as my brother. I forgot about the baby monitor. FML
by hornyloser / 05/02/2011 at 2:46pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML
by BadgerSpirit / 04/27/2011 at 9:35am / United States (Washington) / Kids
by cdn_steed / 04/23/2011 at 9:11am / United States (New York) / Animals
by waterdog / 04/18/2011 at 4:12pm / United States / Work
by mottephobe / 04/06/2011 at 2:22am / United States (Utah) / Animals
by carolinagirl / 04/04/2011 at 12:23pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love
Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML
by Anonymous / 03/26/2011 at 2:24am / United States / Miscellaneous
by dollarstorepwnr / 03/19/2011 at 1:37am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by tinygirl / 03/07/2011 at 1:16am / Health
Today, my cat tried to kill me. While I was sleeping, he put his paws on either side of my face and laid down, covering my nose and mouth. While I was struggling to free myself, I could hear my sister laughing next to me. FML
by Michelle / 02/20/2011 at 12:45pm / United States (California) / Animals
by Anonymous / 02/16/2011 at 12:14am / United States (Minnesota) / Health
by scratchy / 02/08/2011 at 4:39pm / Health
by hehe / 02/02/2011 at 6:57pm / Transportation