dayzz1

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dayzz1

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 August 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5318
  • Number of comments : 39
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About dayzz1 : Chillin

dayzz1's page activity

Visits<b>Kayouri</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 6:24am<b>turdwrangler</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 8:41pm<b>Paksenarrion</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 4:34am<b>Alex5074</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 8:27pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 6:01am<b>twitchywaffles</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 5:19am<b>dkramer0313</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 6:45pm<b>dommiebear</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 11:04pm<b>americanafrican</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 6:25am<b>TheSoupe</b> - the 09/13/2015 at 10:35pm<b>yosico22</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 11:33pm<b>oasis359</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 2:29pm<b>Mendez6</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 1:31am<b>FutBol_Fan_30</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 5:00am<b>seetei</b> - the 04/29/2015 at 8:12pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 6:32am<b>ExpectNeo</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 8:27am<b>Bricktothehead</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 4:29pm

Fucked!<b>dkramer0313</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 12:45am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 10:26pm

dayzz1's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of dayzz1's badges

dayzz1's favorite FMLs

Today, I was browsing the web on my boyfriend's laptop, when I idly clicked a bookmark. It turned out to be his private blog, where he most recently spoke in very creepy detail about his efforts to make me love him, remarking that, "Soon, I'll plant my seed in her breeding hips." FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2012 at 4:49pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, after months of using the empty driveway across the street from my house, a note was placed under my windshield wiper. It read, "Please stop parking in my driveway. P.S. You’re hot. Are you single?" FML

by bronco_lover89 / 05/21/2012 at 9:05pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to save a few bucks and let my mother cut my hair. I then had to wait in the hospital for attention due to the fact that she cut the tip of my ear off. FML

by thejbarrick50 / 05/20/2012 at 10:29pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, someone threw an open soda can at me from a car. It missed, so they circled around and threw an unopened can. That one hit. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2012 at 9:10pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML

by maggierose171 / 05/19/2012 at 11:08am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

by smart move there / 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm / Ireland (Kildare) / Intimacy

Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML

by FML / 05/15/2012 at 3:02pm / Finland / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been paying her half of the rent by taking my ATM card and getting money from my account. FML

by humbug / 05/13/2012 at 9:08am / United States (Colorado) / Money

Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams to come over for a movie. When I answered the door, my little brother ran up behind me, yelled "geronimo" and pulled down my pants and underwear. FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2012 at 8:15am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML

by fired / 05/13/2012 at 2:26am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I went to the store for some pads with my dad. We got them and then went to the cashier. That's when he realized that they were scented. He took one out of the box, sniffed it, made me sniff it, then insisted the cashier smell it. FML

by vron991 / 05/13/2012 at 1:02am / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML

by Jesse / 05/10/2012 at 5:22pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML

by Anonymous / 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I purposely wore a red shirt to Target just so people would talk to me. FML

by reddd / 05/10/2012 at 2:44am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out where all my missing panties have gone, when my 12-year-old daughter was caught selling them to the boys at school. FML

by Anonymous / 05/09/2012 at 6:09pm / Egypt (Al Qahirah) / Kids