davie101

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davie101

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5939
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About davie101 : Aw, poo!

davie101's page activity

Visits<b>pharaohmonkey</b> - the 05/16/2011 at 10:52pm

davie101's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

davie101's favorite FMLs

Today, sun was shining and I felt confident enough to go sunbathing at the beach. In only my bikini and towel, I laid out to get some sun. A while later, a little girl came up to me and said, "Aren't you embarrassed that you're so huge?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2011 at 1:31pm / United States (California) / Holidays

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2011 at 11:14am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2011 at 11:14am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my boyfriend pulled on my pubes and made 'engine starting' noises. This was his attempt at foreplay. FML

by dahs / 04/03/2011 at 7:27am / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy

Today, my wife told me that she was leaving me for someone with more hair. FML

by Baldy / 04/03/2011 at 5:16am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love

Today, I went with my beautiful fiancée to tell her Grandmother, who's a bit senile, that we were engaged. Her response: "I know he's very nice, but think about the chubby little ugly children he'll give you". This was followed by a recollection of her ex-boyfriends who would've fathered attractive kids. FML

by Joe / 04/03/2011 at 3:33am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was giving a strip tease over Skype to my boyfriend. My mom walked in mid-way through, took a long look at me, said hi to my boyfriend, and walked out. FML

by lovely321 / 04/02/2011 at 3:46pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, my ex fiancée, who left me six months ago, asked if I'd mind if she used the wedding dress I bought her for our wedding. She's just gotten engaged again. FML

by Jon / 04/02/2011 at 12:44pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

by Toothy / 04/02/2011 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my dog is so lazy, she doesn't even get out of my bed in the morning to poop. FML

by poopybed / 04/01/2011 at 5:12pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, my friend called me at work to tell me that someone had hit my motorcycle and that it was in pretty bad shape. I chuckled and waited for the "April fools" that would follow. A picture of my wrecked bike came instead. FML

by Username / 04/01/2011 at 1:50pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my boyfriend secretly using my hair straightener while I was in the other room. Too embarrassed to talk to him about it, I left and came back later, only to discover him slipping on a pair of my panties. FML

by WTF? / 04/01/2011 at 11:55am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML

by paige / 03/31/2011 at 11:18pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I dropped my blackberry, but thanks to the protective gel case that I just purchased for it... it bounced and fell right into a sidewalk drainage sewer. FML

by anonymous / 03/28/2011 at 2:48pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bear to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

by catlady1989 / 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.