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danielle25

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danielle25
  • Town/Country : Hogwarts
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 July 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 19875
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About danielle25 : have a question?
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Never think that war, no matter how necessary, nor how justified, is not a crime.
-Ernest Hemingway

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This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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danielle25's favorite FMLs

Today, my family was celebrating my grandma's 90th birthday. I pulled a little prank and got candles that keep relighting. After a few blows, my grandma fainted. FML

#20164153
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8220) - you deserved it (39576)

On 11/15/2012 at 9:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

#20163281
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43997) - you deserved it (5633)

On 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boss told me to cut my long hair. After coming back to work with a clean cut hairstyle, he apparently thought I was the new guy, and said I was going to be trained by "The long-haired girly-looking idiot." FML

#20163115
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18254) - you deserved it (2361)

On 11/14/2012 at 1:10pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, someone stole my iPhone. I used the Find My iPhone app, and located it in the apartment building next to mine. I can hear the ringing sound I've activated, but nobody will answer the door. FML

#20163099
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20202) - you deserved it (1479)

On 11/14/2012 at 12:50pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found a wounded turkey in our backyard. I brought it inside, put it in a cage, and tended to its wounds. I then left. When I got back home, I smelled the wonderful aroma of my mother's cooking. She had prepared a turkey, the one I'd rescued. FML

#20162095
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18341) - you deserved it (3404)

On 11/13/2012 at 6:17pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my brother decided to join me on my first date. Not only did he answer the door with a bat, he also got inside the car and sat next to my date, pushing me to the back. He stayed the entire time, and walked me back to the house. My mom laughed and gave him $20. It was a dare. FML

Today, I found my childhood diary stashed in a box in the attic. I flipped to the last page and noticed a little note written by my now deceased father. It read, "Well son, this diary proves that you're a whiny asshole - Dad." Thanks Dad, from beyond the grave. FML

#20161095
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18137) - you deserved it (3320)

On 11/12/2012 at 9:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I realized that the bird I supposedly heard during the night throughout my childhood is actually the sound my mom makes when she comes. FML

#20160628
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35949) - you deserved it (2470)

On 11/12/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by Heather - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML

#20160393
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23523) - you deserved it (7192)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by mm (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, I stepped outside the house with my wife. She looked up at the sky and asked me in all seriousness if stars are man-made. FML

#20156290
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17500) - you deserved it (2789)

On 11/09/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by baby, baby no (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a furniture store. We split up for a bit, and after a while I went to find him. A salesman noticed I seemed to be looking around for him and said, "Oh, your son is upstairs." We're the same age. FML

#20155909
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17625) - you deserved it (1320)

On 11/09/2012 at 2:26am - misc - by slypher25aussie (man) - United States (California)

Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML

#20155904
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34924) - you deserved it (1507)

On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my friend showed me a video of me in a nightclub. I was holding two Skittles vodka shots and shouting, "Red and green, merry Kwanzaa!" The shots were yellow and purple. I can't remember that night at all. FML

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

#20155776
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21183) - you deserved it (1752)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)

Today, I started dating a seemingly normal guy. Not even four hours into our relationship, he began telling me that he can see spirits, dead people, and that I have a large black dog following me everywhere I go. FML

#20155774
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17691) - you deserved it (2096)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:53pm - love - by holyshitbatman - United States (Ohio)



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