About danielle25 : have a question?
Never think that war, no matter how necessary, nor how justified, is not a crime.
About danielle25 : have a question?
danielle25's FML badges
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
danielle25's favorite FMLs
Today, my dad asked me to send my mom a text since he was driving and I was in the passenger seat. I pulled up my mom's contact on his phone, and I found that my mom had recently sent my dad a picture of her jugs, along with the message, "We miss you." FML
by Sexting Parents / 11/15/2012 at 9:45pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/15/2012 at 9:54am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy
Today, my boss told me to cut my long hair. After coming back to work with a clean cut hairstyle, he apparently thought I was the new guy, and said I was going to be trained by "The long-haired girly-looking idiot." FML
by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 1:10pm / United States (California) / Work
by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 12:50pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I found a wounded turkey in our backyard. I brought it inside, put it in a cage, and tended to its wounds. I then left. When I got back home, I smelled the wonderful aroma of my mother's cooking. She had prepared a turkey, the one I'd rescued. FML
by Anonymous / 11/13/2012 at 6:17pm / United States (Vermont) / Animals
Today, my brother decided to join me on my first date. Not only did he answer the door with a bat, he also got inside the car and sat next to my date, pushing me to the back. He stayed the entire time, and walked me back to the house. My mom laughed and gave him $20. It was a dare. FML
by Mmkay1515 / 11/12/2012 at 10:47pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found my childhood diary stashed in a box in the attic. I flipped to the last page and noticed a little note written by my now deceased father. It read, "Well son, this diary proves that you're a whiny asshole - Dad." Thanks Dad, from beyond the grave. FML
by Anonymous / 11/12/2012 at 9:47pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous
by Heather / 11/12/2012 at 4:20pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy
Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML
by mm / 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm / United Kingdom (Warrington) / Miscellaneous
by baby, baby no / 11/09/2012 at 1:39pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love
Today, my boyfriend and I went to a furniture store. We split up for a bit, and after a while I went to find him. A salesman noticed I seemed to be looking around for him and said, "Oh, your son is upstairs." We're the same age. FML
by slypher25aussie / 11/09/2012 at 2:26am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by SebastianMiko / 11/09/2012 at 2:18am / Canada (Alberta) / Love
Today, my friend showed me a video of me in a nightclub. I was holding two Skittles vodka shots and shouting, "Red and green, merry Kwanzaa!" The shots were yellow and purple. I can't remember that night at all. FML
by Kallian / 11/09/2012 at 1:47am / Australia / Miscellaneous
Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML
by Targeted / 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my… Today, my girlfriend told me there was good news and bad news. Bad news: she's pregnant. Good news:… Today, I realized that sex with my husband has gotten so boring that I'd rather fake an orgasm than…