Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

danielle25

Offline (the 08/27/2014 at 4:08am) | Search for a member

danielle25

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 July 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 21606
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About danielle25 : have a question?
then ask.

Never think that war, no matter how necessary, nor how justified, is not a crime.
-Ernest Hemingway

danielle25's page activity

Visits<b>Sebastian_NG</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 9:24pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 2:07pm<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 3:57pm<b>googlie203</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 11:39pm<b>kool_girl_123</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 1:48pm<b>kev916</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 9:21am<b>thisguy184</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 12:15am<b>Phustercluck</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 7:12pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 5:51pm<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 2:20am<b>darbmutat</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 5:03pm<b>gabix3</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 12:34pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 03/30/2014 at 11:35am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 9:48am<b>Tvolsfan325</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 9:48pm<b>littlekellilee</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 4:18pm<b>sydstoomuch</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 4:12am<b>Zaketh2112</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 1:23pm

danielle25's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of danielle25's badges

danielle25's favorite FMLs

Today, while reading an erotic story I was more excited that the author used a conjunctive adverb than the sexual content in the story. FML

#20456501
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27778) - you deserved it (11150)

On 01/13/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by frustrated - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband suggested a way for us to "make some money" off our pregnancy. His great idea? Pregnancy porn. FML

#20456391
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38442) - you deserved it (4536)

On 01/13/2013 at 12:27am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I opened the door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML

#20455625
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30826) - you deserved it (3037)

On 01/12/2013 at 5:02pm - misc - by fucking mafia or what?? (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while giving my girlfriend a back-rub, she moaned and commented, "If only you could fuck this well." FML

#20455279
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33055) - you deserved it (8274)

On 01/12/2013 at 12:57pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I realized my girlfriend makes the same exact noises in bed and when she eats. I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover. FML

#20444730
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27560) - you deserved it (3525)

On 01/06/2013 at 8:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up with an engagement ring on my left hand. The same one I refused last month. My boyfriend apparently waited for me to be drunk to propose again last night, and has already posted the pics on Facebook. FML

#20427625
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37645) - you deserved it (14351)

On 12/28/2012 at 10:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend using my hand to wank. FML

#20427495
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45660) - you deserved it (9521)

On 12/28/2012 at 6:40am - intimacy - by kmtranter - United Kingdom (Brent)

Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML

#20427288
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35812) - you deserved it (5061)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:49am - misc - by Ren - United States (Ohio)

Today, my 6-year-old nephew opened his Christmas gift. The first words out of his mouth were, "This is cheap." FML

#20427233
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31086) - you deserved it (6308)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:03am - kids - by UngratefulBrat - United States (New York)

Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML

#20427124
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38584) - you deserved it (7952)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States

Today, my girlfriend donated most of my book collection because she got me a Kindle for Christmas. Some were signed, including my Harry Potters. FML

#20427017
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55476) - you deserved it (3948)

On 12/27/2012 at 11:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28976) - you deserved it (7526)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today, after ranting to my boyfriend about how Pandora bracelets are pointless and cliched and that I'd never spend that kind of money on a tiny charm, he gave me my Christmas present. It was a Pandora bracelet. FML

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

#20423881
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40474) - you deserved it (4805)

On 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by geewhy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: