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danielle25

Offline (the 09/30/2014 at 2:00am) | Search for a member

danielle25

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 30 July 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 27789
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About danielle25 : have a question?
then ask.

Never think that war, no matter how necessary, nor how justified, is not a crime.
-Ernest Hemingway

danielle25's page activity

Visits<b>Phustercluck</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 1:55pm<b>Mons</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 1:35pm<b>ratman775</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 10:50am<b>Esoomian</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 12:37pm<b>krazy789</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 12:41am<b>Sebastian_NG</b> - the 10/04/2015 at 10:40am<b>chandler88</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 12:02am<b>sullysair123</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 12:00pm<b>MrFloooo</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 3:41am<b>JackAtPage</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 1:51pm<b>cocoapanda</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 5:55am<b>Agua2</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 6:18pm<b>cooper3991</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 6:10pm<b>truecowboy</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 12:19am<b>Tvolsfan325</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 6:15pm<b>fmhighschool</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 7:51pm<b>googlie203</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 11:39pm<b>kool_girl_123</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 1:48pm

Fucked!<b>Mons</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 7:35pm

danielle25's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of danielle25's badges

danielle25's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom asked me what a MILF is. Apparently that's her nickname at work. FML

#20634708
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56943) - you deserved it (4403)

On 05/01/2013 at 11:55am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my grandpa moved into the apartment next door. The walls are wafer-thin. Goodbye sex life. FML

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

#20613218
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53213) - you deserved it (8477)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Just as I was about to orgasm, he pulled away and said that my vagina is like a mask and that he feels like Bane from Batman. He's been talking in a Bane voice to my vagina for 30 minutes now. I guess sex is over. FML

#20586362
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64204) - you deserved it (11492)

On 04/12/2013 at 11:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was at University when a giant mascot started walking in my direction. As they walked past, they whispered my name seductively. I still don't know who it was. FML

#20578916
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38924) - you deserved it (5167)

On 04/07/2013 at 10:51am - work - by confused - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was taking a patient's blood pressure, and listening for his pulse with my stethoscope. I couldn't hear anything, so I adjusted the cuff and tried again. Still no pulse. He pointed out that my stethoscope was the wrong way around and sneered, "You been smokin' the reefer, boy?" FML

#20535043
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14515) - you deserved it (34752)

On 03/07/2013 at 7:35pm - work - by no sir I have not (man) - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, and I excitedly called my mother to tell her about our engagement. She half-heartedly said, "Aww, that's nice", before changing the topic to what she'd found in her turd earlier. FML

#20534623
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35293) - you deserved it (2501)

On 03/07/2013 at 12:10pm - love - by it's shitty, yeah, stfu (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, wanting to impress my date, I bullshitted her about how I was an environmental scientist. She got so impressed that she invited me over to her place. Not her home, her office. So that I could give her pointers on her current project. She's a real environmental scientist. FML

#20531914
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9921) - you deserved it (73312)

On 03/05/2013 at 3:48am - work - by is there a environmental scientist in the house? - United States (California)

Today, I received a chain-mail text that vividly described what "Tanya" would do to me in my sleep if I didn't forward it on. I'm so paranoid that I did just that. I also realized that accidentally forwarding such things to your boss can get you fired. FML

#20526851
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11278) - you deserved it (49723)

On 03/01/2013 at 11:35am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to use a dictionary before I realized I was being flirted with. FML

#20506101
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28511) - you deserved it (11847)

On 02/14/2013 at 6:01am - love - by lex - United States

Today, I hurt my back while exercising. I can't bend over or lift my arms above my head without intense pain. My husband, however, finds my situation hilarious and has moved everything I use frequently to either the floor or high shelf. He giggles every time I try to retrieve anything. FML

Today, my mum came to my ballet class. She spent the whole lesson sitting at the back yelling at me to "stop sticking your butt out". My ballet instructor had to ask her several times to pipe down. FML

#20495701
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29837) - you deserved it (2342)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:57pm - misc - by embarassinggg (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, my husband started a conversation with, "In Pokémon" and ended the same conversation with "and that's why we should divorce." FML

#20495499
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47294) - you deserved it (4348)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:38am - love - by PokeWife (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

#20494997
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38438) - you deserved it (7172)

On 02/05/2013 at 9:31pm - love - by NewlyDread (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my boyfriend sleeps on a Princess Leia pillow. He's 22. FML

#20494713
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25236) - you deserved it (8792)

On 02/05/2013 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)



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