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dammn

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dammn

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 September 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 96569
  • Number of comments : 200
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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dammn's page activity

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dammn's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

dammn's favorite FMLs

Today, I graduated from college and my parents gave me an apple. Not the computer, the fruit. FML

#1901911
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61768) - you deserved it (4942)

On 05/13/2009 at 1:39pm - misc - by anon (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I gave my 16 year old step daughter and her friends a lecture on respecting other people's privacy. Two hours later, I accidentally walked into her room without knocking. She and her friends were giving each other bikini waxes. Now her friends call me the hypocritical pervert. FML

#1885333
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13521) - you deserved it (72959)

On 05/12/2009 at 8:23pm - kids - by firewait (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's the five year anniversary of my father's death. I was cuddling with my boyfriend and crying about how much I missed him. He replied with, "Sometimes, I think you just like to hear yourself talk." FML

#1845741
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84792) - you deserved it (9973)

On 05/11/2009 at 3:46pm - misc - by bezoar10 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after spending the night hanging out with a beautiful girl we start to walk back to my place. Halfway there she turns and says, "I wish you were a vampire" and goes back home. FML

#1834550
641 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91817) - you deserved it (8372)

On 05/11/2009 at 1:12am - intimacy - by Hallllo (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I tried for the first time putting a condom on my boyfriend using my mouth. I freaked out, swallowed, and started choking on the condom. FML

#1775896
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30376) - you deserved it (77494)

On 05/09/2009 at 11:51am - intimacy - by notsexy (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I almost drowned in the ocean after being sucked into a rip current. When I finally managed to make it back to shore breathless from all the energy it took to get back, I looked down and my swimming trunks were gone. I was crawling on the ground naked in front of a hundred people. FML

Today, I was kneeling down at work to do some cleaning. My co-worker said, "Oh don't your knees hurt, kneeling like that for so long?" Without thinking how it sounded, I said, "Oh no, it's not a problem. I'm on my knees all the time." He's yet to stop hitting on me. FML

#1770571
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20820) - you deserved it (45459)

On 05/09/2009 at 2:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I texted a girl who I had hooked up with the night before to see if she wanted to hang out again. She responded, "I think we should keep it the way it was, before last night." I just met her last night. FML

#1744807
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52012) - you deserved it (12474)

On 05/08/2009 at 7:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, in my class I was nominated for the guy with the worst hairdo. I don't know what is worse, the fact that I was nominated or the fact that I felt let down when I did not win. FML

#1744695
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39087) - you deserved it (7111)

On 05/08/2009 at 7:20am - misc - by GK (man) - Australia

Today, I found out nobody in my family wants to come to my college graduation. I spent 4 years and $60,000 to be the first person in my family to go to college, and nobody wants to see me graduate because the 4 hour ceremony is too long. FML

#1639625
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71127) - you deserved it (3985)

On 05/04/2009 at 7:39pm - misc - by strawberrypuff (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee table. Bored, I lit one, and after a minute I threw it away and sat back down on the couch. I started looking at the box and noticed that it said "Magic Re-Lighting Candles" at the exact moment that my trash can burst into flames. FML

#1631197
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25732) - you deserved it (69800)

On 05/04/2009 at 4:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I sent everyone a text on my phone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May the Fourth be with you!!" I forgot to uncheck my exgirlfriend's number. She texted back, "one of the many reasons I broke up with you." FML

#1628197
358 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25405) - you deserved it (67143)

On 05/04/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by 1suckatL1fe - United States (Virginia)

Today, while at the bakeshop, I got bored waiting in line so I decided to sit on the glass case protecting cupcakes. Turns out there was no glass. I had to pay $50 to cover all the mess and had to walk out of the bakeshop with icing all over my butt. FML

#1618603
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11017) - you deserved it (71707)

On 05/04/2009 at 3:34am - misc - by kandi (woman) - Philippines (Bulacan)



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