crystalnight

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Offline (the 04/13/2015 at 6:05am)

crystalnight

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 2 October 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 8418
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About crystalnight : I'm Commander Shepard and this is my favorite site on the Citadel.

crystalnight's page activity

Visits<b>Devil_Dog1</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 3:43pm<b>phamalocity</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 4:18am<b>LonerTheWolf35</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 11:35pm<b>paintbullits</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 6:40pm<b>redwill85</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 7:55pm<b>LMxDelta38</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 8:03pm<b>chrisseesyou</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 11:09am<b>splashface1</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 7:52pm<b>jaaymurph103</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 1:41pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 8:49am<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 1:01am<b>Sinful1</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 11:16pm<b>kmartFTW</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 11:03pm<b>Jared111</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 10:38pm<b>jb1991</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 10:30pm<b>neo08061972</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 9:57pm<b>Tyrod</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 9:26pm<b>colvindj</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 8:08pm

crystalnight's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of crystalnight's badges

crystalnight's favorite FMLs

Today, I felt manly. I spent almost the entire day peeling paint, power sanding, and applying Spackle for my grandma. Strutting with masculinity, I headed for the shower, only to let out a womanly yelp at a spider hanging at eye level around a corner. Manliness gone. FML

by Anonymous / 03/29/2012 at 9:54pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I thought about how my dad went to get me a Halloween costume and hasn't come home yet. That was 11 years ago. We've moved twice since then. FML

by Anonymous / 03/29/2012 at 12:53pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got my foot stuck in the car seat belt. I kept pulling to loosen it up but it just kept getting tighter till my foot was in the air, so I started panicking and eventually started crying. My boyfriend had to pull over and save me from a seat belt. FML

by greeneyedpothead / 03/29/2012 at 2:33am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I got the feeling that my phone smelt of cigarettes and B.O. I smelt it, realised that it was my hands that smelt, then got confused and thought maybe it was my nose piercing that smelt. I then realised my psychology class was watching me trying to smell my own nose. FML

by Cass / 03/28/2012 at 10:03pm / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that an inspired gardening spree is not as fulfilling as some would have us believe. One punctured hand, cactussed foot and bruised ankle later, I'm beginning to regret waking up this morning and thinking, "What the hell, I'll nuke the shit out of some weeds." FML

by Baustigt / 03/28/2012 at 7:19am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got more happy birthday wishes on my porn account than my Facebook. FML

by MattBC97 / 03/27/2012 at 12:24pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I overheard a girl and a guy sitting behind me on the bus who were talking about Skyrim, one of my favourite games. After a while, I turned around and, as a fellow gamer, thanked them for restoring my faith in humanity. They went very quiet. I'm now that weird guy on the bus. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2012 at 2:40am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation

Today, I saw an article about how some people think internet access is more important than sex. I asked my boyfriend which he thought was more important. He chose internet access. FML

by justwow / 03/21/2012 at 7:58pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML

by brooke / 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I found out what it feels like to get hit in the head with a bat. Not the wooden kind though. The one that bites and claws you when it gets stuck in your hair. FML

by CA19oo / 03/19/2012 at 9:03pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, I asked my mom if she could buy me some anti-nausea medicine. She said, "You just have a stomach ache. It's not like you're throwing up." As she said it, I threw up everything but my childhood memories. She still wouldn't get any medicine. FML

by Shleebs / 03/19/2012 at 3:20pm / United States (Michigan) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I faked a sore throat for the school nurse so I could go home early. It took my dad the rest of the school day just to get there to pick me up. FML

by Anonymous / 03/19/2012 at 12:28pm / United States (Minnesota) / Health

Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML

by noneedtostress / 03/17/2012 at 11:52am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I was laying down in bed when my puppy decided to bite my ear. As I started laughing and pulling him off I noticed one of my $200 earrings got pulled off with it. And now I wait. FML

by lizzie1833 / 03/17/2012 at 10:16am / United States (Ohio) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm / Ireland / Intimacy