critzm

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Offline (the 08/27/2016 at 10:14pm)

critzm

3Fucked!

critzmcritzm
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1132
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About critzm : Orlando, FL. Message me

critzm's page activity

Visits<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 5:18am<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 7:19pm<b>hyposimple90</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 9:51pm<b>royr7395</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 4:48am<b>delilablue95</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 12:07pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 7:48am<b>blahblah005</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 11:04pm<b>onyxkrowe</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 2:01pm<b>hannahlinnea</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 4:55pm<b>alisha0215</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 3:43pm<b>skye147</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 2:00am<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 2:54pm<b>sappy23</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:33am<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 1:35am<b>atl904</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 11:32pm<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:33pm<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:38pm<b>vlalam</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 12:35pm

Fucked!<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 2:48am<b>blahblah005</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 5:04am

critzm's FML badges

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of critzm's badges

critzm's favorite FMLs

Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 2:41pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend was watching TV, when we started getting frisky. I'd just started to give him a blowjob when he pushed me off and said, "Fun's over." Dragon Ball Z had just come back on. He's 21. FML

by SecondBest,IGuess / 04/30/2013 at 1:35pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got caught masturbating, twice, by the same person. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2013 at 3:53pm / Saudi Arabia / Intimacy

Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2013 at 12:11am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my roommate has a masturbation problem; the problem is that he does it in my bed. FML

by awkward O_o / 04/24/2013 at 5:15pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I walked in on my brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML

Today, I had to convince my husband that I'm not having an affair all because I refused to have sex with him. Apparently the fact that I gave birth to our twins 10 days ago isn't a good enough reason to turn him down. FML

by loving wife / 04/21/2013 at 6:20am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, my virginal girlfriend of a year graduated from veterinary school. She can shove her arm shoulder-deep up a cow's ass without blinking, but still feels too insecure to even touch my penis. FML

by Gurior / 04/16/2013 at 1:44pm / Canada / Intimacy

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML

by dating walter white's gf apparently / 04/06/2013 at 3:13pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I got a letter from Yale law school saying I got a 4 year full scholarship. I called my dad crying and read the whole thing... even the bottom, which said, "April fools! Love mom and dad." FML

by madiison09 / 04/01/2013 at 1:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time. She's a screamer. Her dog must have thought I was attacking her, because he immediately came over and started savaging me. FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 2:26pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, while making love to my boyfriend for the first time, I moaned his name. He freaked out over how I wasn't over my ex, and angrily left. They have the same name. FML

by nraecher / 03/23/2013 at 12:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML

by fredo / 03/19/2013 at 8:31am / United States (Iowa) / Intimacy

Today, it was my first time with my boyfriend, at his house, in his Dora the Explorer sheets. FML

by inconnue / 03/18/2013 at 6:34pm / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Love

Today, while I was going down on my husband, our 3-year-old daughter woke up and started crying from the other room. He practically burst into tears too, whining that she was doing it on purpose to ruin his fun. He was serious. FML

by Anonymous / 03/15/2013 at 6:28am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy