Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

crimsonlover4

Search for a member

crimsonlover4
  • Town/Country : New York, NY
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 26 May 1988 (25 years)
  • Number of visits : 1302
  • Number of comments : 92
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 22 posted

About crimsonlover4 : Hello lovelies,
I basically love reading these fmls mainly because they distract me from my own fucked up life. :}

crimsonlover4's last visitors

fmlnjd2013carbivoretazmanmike2013thebestintheworlandy594328MisterCrossNodakN8VKar0Larissa24

crimsonlover4's FML badges

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of crimsonlover4's badges

crimsonlover4's favorite FMLs

Today, I decided to sing a sweet lullaby to my two year old son. In the process, he smacked me in the face and told me to please stop. My sister sings to him all the time and he loves it. FML

#16956898
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23974) - you deserved it (4442)

On 07/03/2011 at 1:36am - kids - by dee - United States

Today, I was baby sitting ten year old twins. When they first saw me, they ran away screaming and hid in the closet. This isn't the first house where this has happened. FML

#16944330
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25157) - you deserved it (4465)

On 07/02/2011 at 1:48am - kids - by annoyedwithkids - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was so broke that I paid for a $0.28 candy bar with my credit card. FML

#16938704
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22219) - you deserved it (10593)

On 07/01/2011 at 5:47pm - money - by Username - United States (Illinois)

Today, in science, we were studying reproduction. Our teacher was reading out the notes and claimed that 'the female's penis stiffens to enter the male's vagina.' I'm supposed to be learning stuff from this woman. FML

#16892674
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35154) - you deserved it (2786)

On 06/28/2011 at 2:39am - intimacy - by girlshavepenises (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

#16879378
360 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58161) - you deserved it (7219)

On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my son's homework was to write a story about what he wants to be when he grows up. He wrote that he plans on being unemployed and living at home until we throw him out, then he'll live under a bridge. He's only 12, but already planning for a future as an unemployed bum. FML

#16676970
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29869) - you deserved it (7406)

On 06/15/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by Seriously (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

#16449288
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61479) - you deserved it (3348)

On 06/01/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by aarone23 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my husband and I had the grand opening to our new winery. We had a big sign out front saying "FREE GRAPES", to try and get more people interested. People kept giving us dirty looks when passing. We later realized there was something covering the "G". FML

#15903380
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31406) - you deserved it (9292)

On 04/24/2011 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I made plans with an old friend that I haven't seen in years. We agreed to meet at a diner and I told him I'd be standing outside. I watched him pull up, look right at me, then do something with his phone. Seconds later, I got a text saying "Sorry, but I'm busy today and can't make it." FML

#15130627
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31040) - you deserved it (2981)

On 02/26/2011 at 8:56pm - misc - by Angela (woman) - United States

Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML

#14838014
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65527) - you deserved it (6031)

On 02/04/2011 at 9:08am - intimacy - by theish -

Today, I found out that the woman I'm currently dating used to be a man. FML

#14105227
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52296) - you deserved it (8843)

On 12/06/2010 at 7:24am - intimacy - by swindstorm -

Today, while having sex on the couch with my single neighbour, a beam in the couch broke. Not even slightly fazed, she said, "It's okay, my husband can fix it." Husband? FML

#14059458
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26656) - you deserved it (6213)

On 12/02/2010 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by nickyboy (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I got hit in the mouth with a hockey stick and lost four teeth. Yesterday I got my braces of six years removed. FML

#14036176
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66960) - you deserved it (4660)

On 11/30/2010 at 2:10pm - health - by Anonymous - Ireland (Monaghan)

Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML

#13773002
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45159) - you deserved it (8491)

On 11/09/2010 at 12:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML

#13418490
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43577) - you deserved it (7927)

On 10/12/2010 at 8:57am - intimacy - by fungettingdressed - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: