About crazytyler01 : I play piano at fancy dinner parties and when im bored in my room i like to pretend im a carrot
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
I agree, your life sucks (25963) - you deserved it (2366)
On 01/27/2013 at 12:57am - love - by pdub523 - United States (Texas)
Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17342) - you deserved it (1855)
On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, I found out that my parents don't know the difference between a foreign person and a deaf person. They've been yelling at our exchange student for the past 2 days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15588) - you deserved it (847)
On 08/21/2012 at 7:17pm - misc - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my dad got so drunk that he had an intense argument with the microwave, resulting in him threatening to ground me after I tried to calm him down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13994) - you deserved it (1029)
On 08/14/2012 at 12:14pm - health - by Todd - United States
Today, my social anxiety hit a new low. I was playing bingo and, although I won, I didn't shout "bingo" because I thought too many people would look at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19833) - you deserved it (6923)
On 08/11/2012 at 10:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)
Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20478) - you deserved it (1384)
On 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm - work - by justlittleoldme - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, a customer punched me in the face for repeating their order back to them because they thought I was making fun of their speech impediment. I have the same speech impediment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27785) - you deserved it (1294)
On 07/24/2012 at 9:37pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, while at work, a lady with a mustache came in and told me she was lost. I was happy to help, but could not stop rubbing my nose due to allergies. As she left she said, "I know I have a mustache you little ass" and stormed out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20616) - you deserved it (2070)
On 07/16/2012 at 12:08am - work - by crazyautio - United States
Today, I tripped and fell on the sidewalk. As I did, a car that was passing by stopped, made a U-turn, and then came back so the people inside could laugh at me. When they were done taunting me, they made another U-turn and continued back in their original direction. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17948) - you deserved it (1618)
On 06/18/2012 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my grandmother threatened to kill herself with a banana. She then got angry with me when I didn't attempt to get the banana away from her. My mom punished me because I didn't take the situation seriously enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23076) - you deserved it (2057)
On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States
Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16691) - you deserved it (18004)
On 03/04/2012 at 3:46pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was screaming at my neighbor to shut his dog up. After 30 minutes of bellowing, he yelled back that it was my dog that was barking. He was right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5326) - you deserved it (35203)
On 12/27/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Yo mom - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend was disgusted because I dropped a Skittle on the floor and ate it. He thought peeing on me in the shower was just fine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28249) - you deserved it (4227)
On 12/04/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42200) - you deserved it (4476)
On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -
Today, I had to sell my phone to pay for the phone bill. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15937) - you deserved it (17757)
On 02/23/2011 at 4:18am - money - by suzyyy (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)
Friday 24 May 2013
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