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crazybird525

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crazybird525

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 337
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 1 posted

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crazybird525's page activity

Visits<b>michaelaranda</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 2:15am<b>claudia19801811</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 1:58pm<b>PenguinBitch</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 7:41pm<b>ohnowhyme123</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 12:38am<b>SaucyGirl106</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 11:13pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 9:47pm<b>Edumcg</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 3:17pm<b>oli_c</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 11:37pm<b>Anthony52</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 5:38pm<b>Apretendbiscuit</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 12:05pm<b>lulubelles</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 2:10pm<b>ifhydomo23</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 4:37pm

Fucked!<b>michaelaranda</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 9:13am

crazybird525's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

One ring to rule them all

You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.

See all of crazybird525's badges

crazybird525's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a date with someone I considered a real catch, my potential soulmate even. He ended up telling me about his fetish for "female smells", sang loudly in Italian in a crowded restaurant, and ate most of the food on my plate. Man, fuck dating. FML

#21458335
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21662) - you deserved it (2169)

On 08/20/2015 at 2:02am - love - by Catsfordays - United States (California)

Today, I finally finished downloading a 60GB TV series after two weeks of waiting. Every single "episode" turned out to be Rick Astley singing Never Gonna Give You Up, on constant repeat. I almost respect the prankster's effort enough to not want to gut him like a fish. Almost. FML

#21439737
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28109) - you deserved it (7721)

On 07/10/2015 at 8:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was exhausted due to staying up all night practicing for the most important performance of my orchestral career. I decided to take a nap to energize myself in preparation of the evening and woke up just in time to realize I'd missed the entire concert. FML

Today, I wore a pair of shorts a size too big while doing laundry. When I ordered a pizza afterwards and answered the door, I realized I looked a little heavy, so I sucked in my stomach. My shorts fell to the ground in front of the delivery guy. FML

#21408368
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27464) - you deserved it (9165)

On 05/11/2015 at 12:40pm - misc - by oops (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out that my family and friends all laugh and compare me to Spongebob behind my back. Why? Because I'm 37 and still can't pass my driver's test. FML

#21391668
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29118) - you deserved it (17451)

On 04/11/2015 at 3:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend made me breakfast because I had a cold. Because my nose was so stuffed, I couldn't tell that our milk had gone bad. I had two cups. And now I'm stuck on the toilet. FML

#21387562
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28986) - you deserved it (2935)

On 04/04/2015 at 2:23pm - misc - by n - United States

Today, I picked up a rock outside and put it in my pocket because it looked cool. A teacher holding the door open stopped me and sent me to the principal. I was confused and asked the teacher why the strict action. She replied that someone has been putting rocks in the toilet. I got a detention. FML

#21386851
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29553) - you deserved it (2798)

On 04/03/2015 at 2:08am - misc - by overreacting - United States (Missouri)

Today, my sister shot my dog with my airsoft gun. When I told my parents, she put on the fakest sobbing I've ever heard, said she didn't even know how to use a gun, and that she saw me shoot my own dog. They believed her and think I need psychiatric help. FML

#21378741
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33058) - you deserved it (2198)

On 03/21/2015 at 1:36am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while walking out of a store eating a candy bar, a homeless man tried to run up and steal my candy. I stuck a leg out and tripped him. The only thing I could think of to yell at him was, "Swiper no Swiping". My kids have ruined my coolness. FML

#21366982
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34586) - you deserved it (6700)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I called a suicide prevention hotline. The guy who picked up sounded drunk, told me to fuck off, and hung up. FML

Today, I did my first night of open-mic standup. The first 5 minutes went badly, but I don't know if it got any better afterwards, because a drunk audience member climbed up on stage and knocked me out. FML

#21341383
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29442) - you deserved it (3675)

On 01/21/2015 at 12:34am - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I found out my boyfriend dresses in my underwear and tights, takes suggestive shots of his ass and legs, and uses them to trick people into thinking he's a girl so they buy him stuff in his online games. FML

#21340885
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34379) - you deserved it (3766)

On 01/20/2015 at 10:08am - misc - by mybfthecrossdresser (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, just to win a bet against my mum that he could make me scream like a bitch, my dad faked his own suicide. He went the whole mile: fake blood everywhere, fake gun, yelling "Goodbye!" and playing a loud gunshot sound effect from his PC, everything. My dad won; my underwear lost. FML

#21339686
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39556) - you deserved it (3589)

On 01/18/2015 at 4:58pm - misc - by pissed out pants (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I refused to serve a woman alcohol, as she looked underage. She complained to my manager about "age racism". FML

#21335591
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32792) - you deserved it (2490)

On 01/12/2015 at 3:23am - work - by nick (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML

#21311441
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43335) - you deserved it (3076)

On 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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