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crash819

Offline (the 11/22/2014 at 3:05am) | Search for a member

crash819

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 598
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About crash819 : Hey I'm Ian, I play soccer, like to hang out with friends, play video games, and consider myself nice the majority of the time. If you wanna know anything else just message me I guess.

crash819's page activity

Visits<b>Callilah</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 9:55am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 6:35pm<b>stripes97</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 11:20pm<b>iiTzNeeNerz</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 9:01am<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 9:38pm<b>a_cute_girli</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 9:51pm<b>AirbornTable</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 10:15pm<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 8:22pm<b>ethangoins</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 10:38pm<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 6:43pm<b>SoCalGirlBabyy</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 11:01pm<b>krish97</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 8:04pm<b>cutycat136</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 7:58pm<b>wonderfulrosie</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 7:16pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 7:50pm<b>aliciavanham</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 6:41pm<b>bigpoppamelanie</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 8:22am<b>haylburg</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 1:22pm

crash819's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of crash819's badges

crash819's favorite FMLs

Today, during an otherwise promising job interview, I was asked how much I thought was too much for a "good hit of blow". I must have stayed speechless for too long, because the guy's next words were, "Yeah, you're not cut out for this." I'm shocked and baffled too. FML

#20825212
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39778) - you deserved it (3879)

On 08/07/2013 at 6:49am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML

#20773275
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27409) - you deserved it (45903)

On 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm - misc - by John - United States

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30832) - you deserved it (65641)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, I uploaded a cute photo of my boyfriend and me on Facebook. Ten minutes later, his friend commented: "Dude! You're supposed to capture the Snorlax, not date it!" FML

#20587403
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48184) - you deserved it (13769)

On 04/13/2013 at 12:25am - love - by Snorlax (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I asked my boyfriend to give me a back rub. He claimed that he had a sore hand, so I retorted, "You have two hands, right?" Still bitter about not being able to have sex with me while I'm on my period, he shot back, "You have two holes, right?" I give up. FML

#20540243
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32994) - you deserved it (50899) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/11/2013 at 8:21pm - intimacy - by Lilypad (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML

Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML

#20186953
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22442) - you deserved it (4085)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by time to put you down, gran (woman) - United States

Today, I was blessed with a girlfriend who loves giving blowjobs. And cursed with a girlfriend who is also somehow really bad at them. FML

#20174308
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32004) - you deserved it (8121)

On 11/22/2012 at 8:19pm - intimacy - by Janitoro (man) - United States

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

#20155776
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27018) - you deserved it (2216)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend learned that calling someone a "stupid bitch" under your breath while staring right at them from six feet away works very differently in my house than at hers. She also learned my sister has one hell of a punch. FML

#20084737
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28319) - you deserved it (11199)

On 09/23/2012 at 7:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML

#20083631
358 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20944) - you deserved it (8839)

On 09/22/2012 at 2:11pm - kids - by SadDad (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while dog sitting my neighbor's Great Dane, I decided to order pizza. As soon as I received it, the dog stood in the hallway staring at me. As soon as I moved, he ran full force and knocked me into the door, causing me to fall and drop the pizza, which he promptly devoured in front of me. FML

#20083358
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20424) - you deserved it (3010)

On 09/22/2012 at 10:12am - animals - by Grauncho - United States (Illinois)

Today, I met a girl I used to make fun of in high school. She was taking my fingerprints after I was arrested. FML

#20037281
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6401) - you deserved it (71789)

On 08/23/2012 at 9:42am - misc - by TheBeautifulOne (woman) - United Kingdom (South Ayrshire)

Today, my husband and I went to the store. Because we have no car, we had to walk four miles in the 115 fahrenheit weather. It didn't click until we were standing outside the door with a metric shit-tonne of ice-cream, that we'd have to tear ass back home to keep it all from melting. FML

#19876028
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6409) - you deserved it (25067)

On 07/01/2012 at 1:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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