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cr1mson_k1ss's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
cr1mson_k1ss's favorite FMLs
Today, I went out for coffee with my sister and my crush. I spent the majority of the date flirting with my crush, and when he dropped us off at home, I told him I had fun on our date. He looked at me surprised and said he'd thought I'd tagged along on his date with my sister. FML
by Lonely / 07/24/2011 at 1:02pm / United States (Ohio) / Love
by oouchh / 07/24/2011 at 8:22am / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Love
Today, I went skinny dipping with my friends. A security man drove up the dock we were on with his bike. After informing us that the dock was closed, and noticing all of our swimsuits on the dock, he refused to move his flashlight beam from us in the water. FML
by Men '86 / 07/24/2011 at 2:41am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 07/24/2011 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Health
by assante2010 / 07/23/2011 at 8:09pm / United States (Maine) / Love
Today, my constant bragging to friends caught up with me, and everyone believes I'm a swinger. Because of this, no girl wants to go out with me, in case they become just another notch under my belt. The truth is, I'm still a virgin. FML
by Anonymous / 07/23/2011 at 7:53pm / United States / Love
Today, I was doing swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your girlfriend's problems! Swim, bitch!" FML
by Baconcook3000 / 07/23/2011 at 7:00am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Love
by tgd4444 / 07/23/2011 at 6:29am / Malaysia (Johor) / Miscellaneous
Today, I'm staying in a hotel where the lights are automatic. They turn on when something moves and turn off when everything is still. I'm a sensitive sleeper and I move in my sleep, so the light wakes me up. It's currently 2 a.m. and all together I've gotten about 20 minutes of sleep. FML
by someone / 07/23/2011 at 4:50am / United States / Miscellaneous
by MaHalKiTa / 07/23/2011 at 3:49am / United States (California) / Geek
by jab43 / 07/22/2011 at 8:57pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate due to all the excitement. Instead I fainted due to lack of oxygen after three minutes. FML
by quickfingers100 / 07/22/2011 at 9:38am / United Kingdom / Intimacy
by James / 07/22/2011 at 1:00am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
by ken / 07/19/2011 at 3:40am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
- Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was… Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he… Today, I’m on a mission in Africa. My company driver is so old, deaf and half blind that I have to…