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  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 567
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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cornered's page activity

Visits<b>muzy</b> - the 01/11/2012 at 12:29pm

cornered's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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cornered's favorite FMLs

Today, I was play-wrestling with my girlfriend. I ended up with a cut, three bruises on my arm and a black eye. She just giggled the entire time. FML

#17938205
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12231) - you deserved it (23773)

On 10/08/2011 at 9:20pm - health - by anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my dad came to confiscate my phone. I stuck it in between my boobs so he wouldn't be able to see it. He said, "Honey, your breasts aren't big enough to hide that." FML

#17935197
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14306) - you deserved it (39577)

On 10/08/2011 at 1:03pm - misc - by G - United States (California)

Today, I was talking with my uncle, when the subject of my abusive mother-in-law came up. He assured me he'd talk to her and straighten things out. Apparently this means posting on her Facebook wall threatening to "pimp-slap a bitch" if she doesn't get her "fat ass out of family business". FML

#17931369
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25203) - you deserved it (3249)

On 10/07/2011 at 10:40pm - misc - by ...... (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

#17884513
423 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32883) - you deserved it (9229)

On 10/02/2011 at 3:27am - kids - by TraumatizedMother (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML

Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML

#17874410
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25803) - you deserved it (6103)

On 09/30/2011 at 10:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I bought a UV light so I could detect cat pee, since I was sure my cat was relieving herself on the carpet. I decided to try it out in the living room first. Nearly half the room lit up like a Christmas tree. FML

#17829441
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31382) - you deserved it (4675)

On 09/25/2011 at 12:15pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend, the girl I completely love, is now dating my father. She tried giving me the "I know I'm not your mother..." speech. FML

#17823429
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52859) - you deserved it (2664)

On 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML

#17818557
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42950) - you deserved it (4372)

On 09/24/2011 at 3:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I went to run outside, only to smack straight into our sliding glass door. Just a few hours beforehand, my mom put up a strip of colored tape to stop this from happening. FML

#17805536
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8433) - you deserved it (27015)

On 09/22/2011 at 4:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend, and started to climb on top of him sexily. He blurted out, "Oh my god, you're like that girl from The Ring." FML

#17794550
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31227) - you deserved it (5478)

On 09/21/2011 at 9:17am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to explain to a woman I didn't know that my husband was killed overseas. She replied, "I know exactly how you feel, my dog died last month." FML

#17793526
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42227) - you deserved it (2872)

On 09/21/2011 at 3:01am - animals - by socks - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed by painting his chest with "marry me?" and an arrow going down. The ring was attached to his penis with a string. FML

#17743940
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41573) - you deserved it (6224)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by ohmaigawd (woman) - Argentina

Today, I had a creepy old guy with awful body odor in my salon. As I was washing his hair, he brought up how he wants to start a garden, and how a woman's monthly flow weirdly helps to make it grow. Then he asked me if I can save up my used tampons for him. FML

#17724529
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36042) - you deserved it (2138)

On 09/11/2011 at 11:23pm - work - by fashionista1787 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I had to explain in great detail why it is inappropriate for my boyfriend to grab at my vagina in public. He did it again twenty minutes later. FML

#17677106
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32568) - you deserved it (6496)

On 09/06/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by foreseeingabreakup (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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