About containsnosoy : tiger.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I went into a shop, not really completely awake. To get to the upper floor, I took the escalator... in the wrong direction. After about 30 seconds (which seemed like hours) trying to climb up the wrong way, my brain started working and by that time I already had a few amused spectators watching me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9257) - you deserved it (5271)
On 01/07/2009 at 12:53am - misc - by maaaryy - Sent from mobile version
Today, I tried to cuddle Simon, my five year old son. He wriggled away and said: "If you need a teddy bear, go buy one! Or find another Simon!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20670) - you deserved it (2123)
On 01/03/2009 at 10:55pm - kids - by sly - Sent from mobile version
Today, to amuse my girlfriend I put on her sexy nightshirt and go out on the balcony for a smoke, wriggling about in front of her window. She laughs until one of her neighbors shouts "HELLO!" from the upper floor, grinning at the show. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9045) - you deserved it (7480)
On 01/03/2009 at 8:59pm - misc - by gabess - Sent from mobile version
Today, when I came home, my daughter's baby-sitter was busy smelling my thongs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19367) - you deserved it (1292)
On 01/02/2009 at 10:26pm - misc - by noname - Sent from mobile version
Today, my girlfriend tried to clean out the fireplace with a vacuum cleaner, she sucked up a bunch of embers which set the vacuum on fire. After a crying for a bit, she went back to finish cleaning up only to find that some embers she dumped in a bucket melted through and set part of the carpet on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12806) - you deserved it (2163)
On 12/31/2008 at 9:53pm - misc - by blck - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my girlfriend left a message on my phone. It was just the sounds of her having sex with somebody. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39171) - you deserved it (1624)
On 12/31/2008 at 6:41pm - intimacy - by - Sent from mobile version
Today, my first (and only true) date ended with the girl saying "Thanks for dinner, I was hungry - and oh, by the way, I'm a lesbian". FML
I agree, your life sucks (19785) - you deserved it (1270)
On 12/30/2008 at 10:21pm - love - by - Sent from mobile version
Today, I sat in the train and the old lady sitting next to me stares at my face. I ask her if she is ok and she starts yelling "Willy! It's you! Where have you been all this time?". The entire train trip went like this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13312) - you deserved it (955)
On 12/25/2008 at 5:30am - misc - by LDF - Sent from mobile version
Today, my boss asked me "can I give you some constructive criticism?". I said yes. He tells me "Your work is really shit. You have no talent and I can't figure out why I hired you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18341) - you deserved it (2029)
On 12/22/2008 at 11:18pm - work - by crapules - Sent from mobile version
Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43024) - you deserved it (4636)
On 12/19/2008 at 11:05am - intimacy - by chicochico - Sent from mobile version
Today, I decided to put my computer on slideshow mode. Did you know that hidden files are also read when you put slideshow on? I discovered this, as did my entire family, when my naked girlfriend appeared on the screen. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12178) - you deserved it (8030)
On 12/19/2008 at 12:17am - misc - by Mr Hawks - Sent from mobile version
Today, I need to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone has left work, I decide that, since I AM a jedi, my penis ought to be my Light saber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: “At least someone is having fun!” It was my boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5711) - you deserved it (19656)
On 12/15/2008 at 10:58pm - work - by lopez - Sent from mobile version
Today, I surprise my girlfriend by turning up at her flat on her twenty-fourth birthday. She gets up from the couch as I enter and I shout: "Tonight, my cock is going to stab you twenty-four times!" (Okay, that's not smart). That's when her father glances over from the couch and greets me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8112) - you deserved it (44780)
On 12/13/2008 at 10:58pm - intimacy - by Mateo - Sent from mobile version
Today, my wife, in her magnificent wedding dress, had her period during the ceremony. How did I find out? The same way everyone else did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36959) - you deserved it (1915)
On 12/13/2008 at 12:48am - misc - by noname - Sent from mobile version
Today, I went to fill up my car. 500 metres before the petrol station, I saw a group of motorcyclists in my rear view mirror. I slowed down and pulled over to let them past. In fact, they were also going to fill up. 35 motorcyclists and 2 petrol pumps. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13790) - you deserved it (4935)
On 12/09/2008 at 2:01am - misc - by gui909 - Sent from mobile version
Monday 17 June 2013
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