containsnosoy

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containsnosoy

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 25 October 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 15985
  • Number of comments : 466
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About containsnosoy : tiger.

containsnosoy's page activity

Visits<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 7:05am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 1:34am<b>Dynamite73</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 1:20pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 1:25pm<b>MrsJoHood</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 2:15am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 4:51pm<b>kaitlynjane</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 9:19am<b>jayceev2</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 11:31am<b>mushroomcassette</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 6:59pm<b>Zombiebait56</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 11:30pm<b>jesuis_julie</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 7:50pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 8:34am<b>mordecaiandrigby</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 3:21pm<b>yuggi1</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 3:13pm<b>Mortoli</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 5:48am<b>rabbi1010</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 2:24am<b>goodwithoutgods</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 2:22pm<b>Crossslide69</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 3:54pm

Fucked!<b>MrsJoHood</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 8:15am

containsnosoy's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

containsnosoy's favorite FMLs

Today, I fell asleep on the train, totally wiped out after last night's party, which involved lots of booze and spicy Indian food. I wake up and notice a small boy staring at me, so I smiled at him. He turned to his father and said, "Daddy, the farting man has just woken up." FML

by mark / 01/10/2009 at 9:11pm / Kids

Today, I came home from work. I crept up to the bedroom to gently wake up my girlfriend. I touch her shoulder and slowly leant in to give her a tender kiss. She suddenly wakes up and grabs me by the throat... I keep forgetting she's in the army. FML

by Cùchulainn / 01/09/2009 at 10:23pm / Love

Today, I was teaching a class but kids were chatting. After 3 soap box speeches about "The next person who talks gets a note to take home," one kid looked right at me and went "meow". FML

by Liz / 01/09/2009 at 3:54am / Kids

Today, taking the train to work after the worst hangover ever, two immense fat women start talking about rim jobs. I got up to switch cabins just in time for their conversation to switch over to RECEIVING rim jobs. I sprayed puke all over myself and an innocent bystander. FML

by depraved / 01/08/2009 at 6:21am / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I signed up on one of those "cheater" dating sites. I ended up meeting my own girlfriend. FML

by Lou Czar / 01/07/2009 at 6:56pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my wife sent nudie pics to her ex-husband. My wife's excuse for the pics? "I needed a compliment because I thought you didn't love me." FML

by beno / 01/07/2009 at 10:25am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I received a really nice red satin set of underwear, with a bra, a thong and a corset... From my grandfather. FML

Today, I went into a shop, not really completely awake. To get to the upper floor, I took the escalator... in the wrong direction. After about 30 seconds (which seemed like hours) trying to climb up the wrong way, my brain started working and by that time I already had a few amused spectators watching me. FML

by maaaryy / 01/07/2009 at 12:53am / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to cuddle Simon, my five year old son. He wriggled away and said: "If you need a teddy bear, go buy one! Or find another Simon!" FML

by sly / 01/03/2009 at 10:55pm / Kids

Today, to amuse my girlfriend I put on her sexy nightshirt and go out on the balcony for a smoke, wriggling about in front of her window. She laughs until one of her neighbors shouts "HELLO!" from the upper floor, grinning at the show. FML

Today, when I came home, my daughter's baby-sitter was busy smelling my thongs. FML

by noname / 01/02/2009 at 10:26pm / Kids

Today, my girlfriend tried to clean out the fireplace with a vacuum cleaner, she sucked up a bunch of embers which set the vacuum on fire. After a crying for a bit, she went back to finish cleaning up only to find that some embers she dumped in a bucket melted through and set part of the carpet on fire. FML

by blck / 12/31/2008 at 9:53pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend left a message on my phone. It was just the sounds of her having sex with somebody. FML

Today, my first (and only true) date ended with the girl saying "Thanks for dinner, I was hungry - and oh, by the way, I'm a lesbian". FML

Today, I sat in the train and the old lady sitting next to me stares at my face. I ask her if she is ok and she starts yelling "Willy! It's you! Where have you been all this time?". The entire train trip went like this. FML