containsnosoy

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containsnosoy

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 25 October 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 17413
  • Number of comments : 466
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About containsnosoy : tiger.

containsnosoy's page activity

Visits<b>bananajoe666</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 5:20pm<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 7:05am<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 1:34am<b>Dynamite73</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 1:20pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 1:25pm<b>MrsJoHood</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 2:15am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 4:51pm<b>kaitlynjane</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 9:19am<b>jayceev2</b> - the 05/06/2015 at 11:31am<b>mushroomcassette</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 6:59pm<b>Zombiebait56</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 11:30pm<b>jesuis_julie</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 7:50pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 8:34am<b>mordecaiandrigby</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 3:21pm<b>yuggi1</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 3:13pm<b>Mortoli</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 5:48am<b>rabbi1010</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 2:24am<b>goodwithoutgods</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 2:22pm

Fucked!<b>MrsJoHood</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 8:15am

containsnosoy's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

containsnosoy's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the school dentist for the yearly routine check. She took ages trying to clean out my teeth with the metal toothpick-thing, constantly hitting my gums. After half an hour of pain and spitting blood, she looks up and says, laughing: "Oh, I forgot to put my glasses on". FML

by dentistvictim / 10/16/2009 at 3:27am / Norway (Oslo) / Health

Today, I stumbled upon my girlfriend's Twitter account that I didn't know existed. A recent entry states that living with me is pathetic; "it's just that the current economical situation doesn't leave her with many options." FML

by Good_old_Grim / 10/15/2009 at 9:51am / Latvia (Riga) / Miscellaneous

Today, a customer at work became violent and started hitting me and my coworker. Not wanting him to get the shit beat out of us, I used a move that pinned the guy on the ground. The police came and he was arrested. I was then fired for assaulting a customer. FML

by selfdefense / 10/12/2009 at 12:16am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Work

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

by oxjessiiox / 10/11/2009 at 11:42am / United Kingdom (Leicestershire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend called me and told me he wanted me to stay the night. I decided to wear my sexiest outfit for him so I put on my kinky nurse outfit and drove over to his house. I let myself in his front door, to which I found 40 of my closest friends staring at me for my surprise birthday party. FML

by perfectmoment / 10/10/2009 at 6:22pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I learned that the excessive groin sweating I've been trying to deal with for weeks isn't groin sweating. It's a slow and steady stream of urine that I have no control over. FML

by lizzzie / 10/09/2009 at 5:25pm / United Kingdom (Dorset) / Health

Today, I was on the phone with my friend, when my four year old nephew came in, asking who I was talking to. I told him it was Santa Claus, so he insisted on talking to him. I handed over the phone and I hear, "Santa is fake. Grow up." I spent the next two hours with a screaming child proving Santa exists. FML

by stupidsantaclaus / 10/08/2009 at 1:14am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I found out that the student tutor my son advised me to hire was my son's girlfriend. I have been paying her $20 an hour for the last 3 weeks to make out with my son in his room. FML

by Anonymous / 10/07/2009 at 7:12pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my friend's paintball party and we were doing it in a forest nearby. When I arrived at his house, his parents said they already started, so I geared up and went out there to find that there was a note on a tree. It said 'Sorry', and then twenty people jumped from bushes and ambushed me. FML

by shitballs_911 / 10/07/2009 at 7:13am / United Kingdom (Kingston upon Thames) / Miscellaneous

Today, I chose to wear khaki dress pants to class to look professional. I was in the hallway when one of my professors pulled me aside to ask if I was feeling well. Apparently, the dryer had "eaten" my pants and made a large brown stain on the butt, making it look like I had crapped myself. FML

by coolchicka05 / 10/06/2009 at 4:28am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was stopped by a cop while walking down the street. He was slowly trailing me before pulling along side of me and asking how my night was going. He then said, "You know I can't let you do this. Know those new jeans you bought? The sticker is still on the leg" and drove off. FML

by limecat / 10/06/2009 at 3:12am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a store to buy a man's thong because my girlfriend wanted me to. When I went in I also grabbed some lingerie for her. Thinking I was being clever I wrapped it up in a t-shirt so no one would notice and went to checkout. The cashier then called for a price check on the thong. FML

by danskinnow / 10/04/2009 at 10:01pm / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to dress in all black with a ski mask and use my spare key to break into my house as a joke. He though it was even funnier when I jumped out the window and broke my leg. FML

by Anonymous / 10/03/2009 at 1:55pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking to my friends Halloween themed birthday party in my zombie costume. Apparently, my crazy coke addicted neighbor found the costume too realistic. He tackled me. FML

by Pwnedofthedead / 10/03/2009 at 11:34am / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, my english teacher asked me why I didn't have my project completed. Thinking quick on my feet I told her it was because my grandmother had just passed away. Apparently they go to the same country club and have known each other for years. My teacher started crying and ran out of the room. FML

by Anonymous / 10/02/2009 at 5:07pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work