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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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containsnosoy

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containsnosoy
  • Town/Country : usa
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 October 1989 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 7311
  • Number of comments : 466
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About containsnosoy : tiger.

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containsnosoy's favorite FMLs

Today, while at work as a lifeguard, an older gentleman who comes in almost every morning wearing a very tight swimming suit, came up to me and said, "I don't want you having any erotic fantasies of me." After a long pause he added, "Actually, I wouldn't mind it if you do." FML

#9161234 (284)

I agree, your life sucks (25232) - you deserved it (2565)

On 03/17/2010 at 3:32pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I took my girlfriend of five and a half years to family dinner at a restaurant. After we all had finished dessert, I got down on one knee, pulled out my great grandmother's ring and proposed. The entire restaurant was dead silent. She looked around and then slowly walked out. FML

#9157665 (365)

I agree, your life sucks (55927) - you deserved it (4159)

On 03/17/2010 at 11:38am - love - by david (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, after a fire alarm went off, everyone was going back into the building. I had never gone up the stairs before because I live on the 9th floor. As everybody was going back inside, I followed some guys right into their suite on the 1st floor, thinking it was the way to the stairs. FML

#9148913 (92)

I agree, your life sucks (6169) - you deserved it (16363)

On 03/17/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by rawrrrr (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking with my girlfriend of a year and a half on the beach. Everything was fine until she saw a plane with a banner behind it saying "Cassie, will you marry me?" She said yes. I didn't order a plane. FML

#9122302 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (36233) - you deserved it (2885)

On 03/16/2010 at 12:50am - love - by ManInTrouble - United States (California)

Today, I landed in Hawaii for my vacation. I have a really bad ear infection, and to top my day off, my girlfriend blurted out mid-flight that she thinks we're not going to work out. Aloha! FML

#9025473 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (17532) - you deserved it (1049)

On 03/12/2010 at 4:17pm - love - by aloha - Sent from mobile version

Today, while attempting a DIY pest removal, one of our tenants lit a skunk on fire. FML

#8956566 (204)

I agree, your life sucks (14140) - you deserved it (1491)

On 03/09/2010 at 9:07pm - misc - by Al (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my roommate confronted me about my eating disorder. She described in length how emaciated-looking my chest has become and how she only wants to help. Except that I don't have an eating disorder. My sternum is deformed and I have only recently become confident enough to wear low-cut tops. FML

#8940307 (189)

I agree, your life sucks (25599) - you deserved it (1431)

On 03/09/2010 at 3:57am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for this sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML

#8938594 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (20378) - you deserved it (1542)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:31am - misc - by CreepedOut (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out my husband of 10 years has a online blog. Excited to read about myself, I began skimming, only to find out that every entry is him explaining how he let his "soulmate" walk away 9 years ago because of his "previous commitment" and how he regrets it every day. FML

#8909849 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (24922) - you deserved it (1959)

On 03/08/2010 at 12:14am - love - by smashleighfig - Sent from mobile version

Today, my husband bought me a beautiful pair of earrings for my birthday, to match the necklace he'd spent months searching for online the previous year. What necklace? He gave me a watch he found at Walmart last year. I wonder who the lucky girl with the necklace is. FML

#8870594 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (20009) - you deserved it (1443)

On 03/06/2010 at 2:42pm - love - by happybirthday (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was on the city bus, and there was a woman and her child sitting behind me. I began to feel tugging on my jacket so I leaned forward, assuming the child was pulling at my jacket. I sat back and felt the tugging again. After a couple of minutes, I heard the mother say "stop chewing on that!" FML

#8746322 (105)

I agree, your life sucks (16883) - you deserved it (1539)

On 03/01/2010 at 11:59am - kids - by nd.11 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that my abusive, obsessive, psychotic ex-boyfriend from over two years ago still has a thing for me. How did I find out? Although I've ignored him walking unnecessarily past my house for the past two months, it was hard to ignore when he fell from a tree outside my window. FML

#8704782 (229)

I agree, your life sucks (25780) - you deserved it (1565)

On 02/27/2010 at 11:30pm - love - by sacrophage (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I brought my best friend to my uncle's birthday party. We were having a great time until my grandmother walked up to us and said to me, "You sure have a nice looking boyfriend." My friend is a girl. She has cancer and lost all of her hair due to chemotherapy. FML

#8690586 (185)

I agree, your life sucks (27835) - you deserved it (1224)

On 02/27/2010 at 2:03pm - health - by hairplease (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I realized explosive diarrhea can happen, and at the most inopportune times, such as on the day of MY wedding. At the alter while my husband said his vows. FML

#8658648 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (41584) - you deserved it (1802)

On 02/26/2010 at 5:23am - love - by pain (woman) - Japan

Today, while running errands, I put a frozen water bottle on the dash to thaw out. But when I tried to hurry and turn into busy traffic, the water bottle flew off the dashboard, hit the gear shift and stalled the car out in the middle of the road. I think I was flipped off 12 times. FML

#8609199 (84)

I agree, your life sucks (6128) - you deserved it (11677)

On 02/24/2010 at 3:08am - misc - by bbwena - United States (Iowa)