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cohofourtyfour

Offline (the 08/26/2015 at 2:17pm) | Search for a member

cohofourtyfour

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 6 June 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1777
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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cohofourtyfour's page activity

Visits<b>funky2525</b> - the 01/28/2013 at 9:00am

cohofourtyfour's FML badges

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cohofourtyfour's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I told my parents that I finally managed to conceive. My mom burst into tears of joy and said how great it was that she's finally going to be a "real" grandma, all within earshot of our adopted and now-devastated daughter. FML

#21457997
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34299) - you deserved it (1737)

On 08/19/2015 at 11:00am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa

Today, it's been 2 days since my boyfriend "accidentally" slipped into the wrong hole while continuing to hammer me at full speed. I still can't poop or even walk right. FML

#21456278
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28864) - you deserved it (3553)

On 08/15/2015 at 5:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33215) - you deserved it (2322)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, most of my family was out of the house, so I took the opportunity to go to the bathroom and browse some porn. Five minutes later my sister comes and asks me to disconnect from bluetooth and that my "dinosaur noises" were blocking her and her friend's music. I'm currently hiding in shame. FML

#21441140
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22801) - you deserved it (10850)

On 07/13/2015 at 5:15pm - intimacy - by Nigel - United States

Today, I had to explain to several young children why asking the new blind girl to play hide and seek with them is inappropriate. FML

#21439546
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25689) - you deserved it (2218)

On 07/10/2015 at 12:52pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, a guy asked me for my number. Now I deeply regret giving it to him, because he won't stop sending me Bible quotes and pictures of Jesus. FML

Today, my mom announced my pregnancy to the entire family via Facebook with the post, "Just went from a MILF to a GILF in one moment of unprotected sex." FML

#21401833
101 comments

Today, my boyfriend decided to show off one of his favorite skills: Peeing on my ceiling. FML

#21378092
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27833) - you deserved it (3198)

On 03/19/2015 at 11:22pm - love - by TooShortToCleanThat - United States

Today, my dad spent 30 minutes incorrectly correcting me about our legal system. He thinks he knows more than me because he's been divorced twice. I'm a lawyer. FML

#21376903
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32476) - you deserved it (2260)

On 03/18/2015 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my brother wore a T-shirt to my birthday party that said "I dig skinny chicks". I'm a recovering anorexic and told him that I didn't really like his shirt. His response? "Don't let the liberal media brainwash you into thinking it's OK to be fat." FML

#21376642
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33761) - you deserved it (4580)

On 03/17/2015 at 8:18pm - misc - by Idigrespectfulattire (woman) - Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain)

Today, at Walmart, I overheard a lady telling a teenage girl that the secret to keeping a guy for life is giving him anal, but that it's important to clean your "shitter" beforehand. I can't believe these kinds of sick freaks actually exist. FML

#21375051
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29581) - you deserved it (7926)

On 03/15/2015 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the grocery store with my four-year-old. She has some issues with wetting the bed, so I told her that if she wasn't sure if she was dreaming about "going", she should pinch herself to make sure she's awake. In the produce section, she pinched herself, smiled proudly, and peed. FML

#21374802
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30059) - you deserved it (5210)

On 03/15/2015 at 12:23am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, some homeless person came up to the window and started doing a voice-over. FML

#21374736
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34319) - you deserved it (12540)

On 03/14/2015 at 11:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while on a date, I desperately let out a stealth fart in my date's car. I didn't have the nerve to own up to it, even as he started panicking and thinking the smell was coming from his engine. FML

#21374172
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27660) - you deserved it (7761)

On 03/14/2015 at 12:27am - misc - by thecarisfine (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



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