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codazombie

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codazombie

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Thursday 24 December 1987 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 292
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About codazombie : music=life

codazombie's page activity

Visits<b>vashhybrid</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 8:34am<b>ThepurpleCow</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 2:46pm<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 2:03pm<b>andy594328</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 8:02am<b>TheDoctorDonna</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 10:48pm<b>AGB10</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 10:30am<b>btf420</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 11:48pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 5:09pm<b>bassbadass</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 2:56pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 9:07pm<b>MurphyGallagher</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 3:01pm<b>ceji3</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 11:18pm<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 4:47am<b>Awahso</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 12:08am<b>Valeyard</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 1:41pm<b>Beyto7000</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 11:33pm<b>Saddyohh</b> - the 08/01/2013 at 11:44pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 11:33am

codazombie's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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codazombie's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26712) - you deserved it (3089)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job, mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

#21283795
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34943) - you deserved it (4115)

On 10/23/2014 at 2:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41770) - you deserved it (7880)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42448) - you deserved it (13772)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

#21227114
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43378) - you deserved it (7035)

On 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by WickedRene (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35156) - you deserved it (11506)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50658) - you deserved it (6633)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while being high for the first time after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I called my dental assistant pretty before leaving, and then shouted, "I NEED TO POOP!" to the whole office. FML

#21191137
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38876) - you deserved it (7077)

On 06/28/2014 at 2:28am - health - by Madridsta - United States (California)

Today, while in the yard, my 18-month-old son decided to take off running into the road, where a car was driving. I rushed after him, only for one of my dress straps to suddenly break without warning. It must have looked like I was trying to flag down the driver with my flailing tit. FML

#21183414
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42206) - you deserved it (5620)

On 06/21/2014 at 7:14pm - misc - by icandothecancan - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

#21179512
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52415) - you deserved it (4607)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my roommate's pets conspired against me. "The dog ate my homework" has apparently become too clichéd for them. The new excuses are, "My cat chewed through my laptop power cable" and "the gecko ate my pen drive." FML

#21171341
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40706) - you deserved it (4426)

On 06/11/2014 at 8:00pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my friend announced that she'd lost weight recently. As I was congratulating her, my baby sister said, "I think you're still fat but that's good because you can give more meat to God when you go to heaven." Now I have to explain to a 6-year-old that God isn't a cannibal. FML

#21152005
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45921) - you deserved it (5305)

On 05/26/2014 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, I took my kids to an Easter party hosted by a local church. The nice lady in charge told the kids, "Jesus died, but He rose to life again!" My 9 year old screamed, "LIKE A ZOMBIE!" FML

#21116666
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40444) - you deserved it (7957)

On 04/18/2014 at 8:14pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my son said his first complete sentence: "Mommy likes shit." Not only will he not stop saying it, I have no idea who taught him to say it in the first place. FML

#21116585
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39414) - you deserved it (4372)

On 04/18/2014 at 6:35pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my obsession with saying "your mom" reached a new level when my anatomy teacher asked what I did with my pencil. FML

#21108224
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19446) - you deserved it (44914)

On 04/09/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by Motha - United States (Utah)



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