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Today, I was with my boyfriend and we were talking about childhood memories. He told me about a girl he made fun of in middle school. That was me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30657) - you deserved it (2572)
On 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35998) - you deserved it (3751)
On 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I got mugged by a guy who was threatening me with a stapler. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22004) - you deserved it (6068)
On 11/08/2011 at 9:39am - misc - by StaplerScared - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I came home from school, only to find I was locked out. The cars were all there, but no one was in. It wasn't until I heard continuous banging from my parents' window that it clicked. They locked me out for over an hour in freezing weather just to have sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31200) - you deserved it (3066)
On 11/02/2011 at 12:37pm - intimacy - by miley098 - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my fiancé and I got married. We both promised to remain abstinent until our wedding day. She's on her period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37302) - you deserved it (6938)
On 10/31/2011 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Andrew - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was about to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. Just as she took her shirt off, her phone rang. It was her mom demanding she return home. Now I've been cockblocked, and my girlfriend's mom seems to be a god damn clairvoyant. Awesome. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22027) - you deserved it (3782)
On 10/27/2011 at 10:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42784) - you deserved it (6047)
On 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm - intimacy - by Mini-wanker (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I had to take my son to the emergency room for shooting himself in the ass with a BB gun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21907) - you deserved it (3446)
On 10/15/2011 at 1:05pm - kids - by myfamilyisodd (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, the man I love still thinks that female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30097) - you deserved it (4151)
On 10/12/2011 at 12:26am - intimacy - by ksamp - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I showed my boyfriend a calendar, marked with the number of times we've had sex over the past month. Then followed by a calendar of the month before, which had almost triple the number of hits. I had to point out that our stats need to improve. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17962) - you deserved it (12154)
On 10/04/2011 at 3:04am - intimacy - by friskeyk14 - United States (California)
Today, I realized that due to my anti-depressants, I can no longer orgasm. At. All. Which depresses me more. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29982) - you deserved it (3240)
On 09/29/2011 at 5:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28887) - you deserved it (2346)
On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -
Today, I found out my wife and three daughters all have their period on seperate weeks. I now have no break from yelling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32431) - you deserved it (4066)
On 09/17/2011 at 12:39am - misc - by thedeerman (man) - United States (California)
Today, we found out why we were getting notes on our door telling us to "move out or else." As my mom works for the government and we have a direct-TV dish on our roof, our neighbor thinks we were sent to listen to his phone calls and read his mind. We were here before he was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22869) - you deserved it (1631)
On 07/17/2011 at 9:51pm - misc - by SonOfaSpy (man) - United States
Today, my 15 year old girlfriend called to tell me she is pregnant. Her dad is ex-military, and makes a point of cleaning his guns every time I go to her house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14783) - you deserved it (69235)
On 07/07/2011 at 3:43am - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
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