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About cobaltjedi : ummm...
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, I woke up late and had to rush to catch my bus. Upon arriving at school, I was hot from running and took off my sweater. It was then, in a lecture hall with 400 people, that I realised I hadn't put a shirt on underneath. FML
Today, I had to go to a big dinner with my insane relatives. Highlights of conversation included my sister telling us about the "country of Iowa", my dad accusing me of faking my chronic fatigue syndrome, and my grandpa claiming that Nelson Mandela is the Antichrist. FML
Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML
Today, my girlfriend and I attempted some bondage for the first time. Within seconds of the handcuffs being put on, I went into a serious panic attack. I was playing the dominant; my girlfriend was the one in cuffs. FML
Today, at work, a woman came up to the snack bar and ordered a pretzel with no salt. When I served her the food, she angrily complained about it having no salt, followed by her throwing the whole thing in my face. FML
Today, my friends took my work laptop and changed the sounds. Now, whenever I remove a USB device, a woman's voice screams "Put it back!" and when I insert a USB device, it says "Oh, you need to push it in harder!" I don't know how to change it back. FML
Today, working my job, I had to explain to a kid that Pokemon is owned by Nintendo and they don't make it for the Xbox. Upset by this, he took hold of my leg and started biting. I'm also suspended, because his mother complained when I kicked him off me. FML
Today, I was bombarded with phone calls from debt collectors. After some investigation, it turns out my grandma, who has dementia, has been going into our mailbox and throwing away the outgoing mail because it wasn't addressed to her. I'm now apparently 3 months behind in payments. FML
Friday 18 April 2014