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  • Number of visits : 82
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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cmackenon's FML badges

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cmackenon's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my uncle's funeral. I wasn't very close with him, but I still wanted to be respectful. My boyfriend, being the jackass that he is, was singing the Spider Pig song from The Simpsons under his breath while making his fingers walk up my leg, trying to get under my skirt. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26913) - you deserved it (6744)

On 10/01/2012 at 12:23am - love - by SorryUncleTommy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I dropped a whole batch of penis-shaped cookies on the floor. Then I thought, "5-second rule" and started eating them. And then I realized that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24854) - you deserved it (13386)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by RawrSparkle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35917) - you deserved it (1688)

On 08/17/2012 at 8:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my dad was driving me home and was angrily explaining how my boyfriend was a bad influence and that he was hanging out with the wrong crowd. After finally convincing him to give him another chance, we stopped at a traffic light just in time to see my boyfriend being chased by police. FML


I agree, your life sucks (12650) - you deserved it (36670)

On 07/03/2012 at 7:20pm - love - by Jenna (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

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  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

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