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cmac86

Offline (the 01/29/2016 at 9:10am) | Search for a member

cmac86

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 29891
  • Number of comments : 1525
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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cmac86's page activity

Visits<b>bananajoe666</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:06pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 8:10pm<b>yourmomshotfirst</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:11pm<b>JohntheDeadlock</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 8:43am<b>Allornone</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 10:41pm<b>raven83</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 6:31am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 2:28pm<b>luther48</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:36pm<b>chrissy0</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 1:24am<b>doge750</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 11:33pm<b>Kyle17206</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 10:32pm<b>hduebdo</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 7:33am<b>nyf137</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 2:52am<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 4:19pm<b>JaysBae</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 2:14pm<b>user716</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 6:40pm<b>camcaresjkno</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 10:19pm<b>mondesno</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 9:54am

Fucked!<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 8:14am<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 11:22pm<b>16bees</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 4:13pm<b>Melharr</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 8:26pm<b>pitbull3k</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 11:13am

cmac86's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of cmac86's badges

cmac86's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

#21127873
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52230) - you deserved it (4758)

On 05/01/2014 at 10:17am - animals - by Felicityfrank (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, due to my short temper, I punched myself in the nose because I wouldn't stop sneezing. FML

#21116112
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23629) - you deserved it (57591)

On 04/18/2014 at 7:09am - health - by Ow (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I'm a little over a month pregnant. My fiancé has decided that if we both act like I'm not pregnant, "the baby will get the hint and go away". FML

#21050194
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57884) - you deserved it (7061)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:50am - kids - by LadyDeadpool88 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks basically threatened to kill herself if I don't start thinking about having a child with her soon. FML

#21049518
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59212) - you deserved it (6679)

On 02/03/2014 at 5:47pm - love - by well i'm fucked (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found a Google search for "erectile dysfunction" in my browser search history, along with pages about treatments for it. I'm a woman, and I live alone. FML

#21049445
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48454) - you deserved it (3683)

On 02/03/2014 at 4:16pm - misc - by jai90 (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, after years of insomnia and going to doctors to help get a regular sleeping pattern, I finally fell asleep without the help of medication, only to dream about being chased by an angry seal and singing to Rihanna with a horse. This is probably why I don't sleep. FML

#21049132
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44295) - you deserved it (4109)

On 02/03/2014 at 8:29am - health - by Sleepless (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I joined my friends out birthday clubbing. After I'd gotten a little drunk, a few guys asked for my number. I rattled off random numbers, until I accidentally said my mother's. Guess who woke up to a text at 2:17 in the morning, containing a picture of a penis. FML

#21022033
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28748) - you deserved it (37553)

On 01/08/2014 at 7:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, to avoid a guy who's been creepily following me around school lately, I ducked into the girl's bathroom. After few minutes, he stuck his head in with his eyes closed and asked if I was done yet. FML

#21021456
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63669) - you deserved it (4654)

On 01/08/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by stalked - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to explain to one of my high school students that the importance of Pearl Harbor was not, in fact, because the Japanese stole the US pearl supply. FML

#21020544
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44812) - you deserved it (3865)

On 01/07/2014 at 7:00pm - work - by tpj24 - United States (Iowa)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to a figure holding a knife above me. After I screamed in terror, the figure burst into laughter. It was my mom. She did this as payback for me not washing the dishes last night after making food. FML

#21016927
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43231) - you deserved it (17132)

On 01/04/2014 at 6:43pm - misc - by awkwardpartybear (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55661) - you deserved it (8694)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my grandma added to my elephant collection by giving me some underwear with elephant ears on the hips, and a long, sock-like nose. She has no idea they're meant for a guy. FML

#20989013
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54039) - you deserved it (5205)

On 12/11/2013 at 3:14pm - intimacy - by ElephantLover (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while on my way to work, an elderly woman complimented me on my breast cancer scarf. I explained that my grandmother made one for all her female grandchildren before passing away two years ago. The woman then went psycho and almost strangled me in an attempt to steal it. FML

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

#20988758
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44877) - you deserved it (7323)

On 12/11/2013 at 8:14am - misc - by pootie (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my parents kicked me out of the house because they were having a party. They gave me twenty bucks to go see a movie. Well, the movie ended pretty quick, but the trauma of seeing my parents in a swingers' orgy will take some time getting over. FML

#20969815
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72809) - you deserved it (6145)

On 11/25/2013 at 1:16am - intimacy - by why god - United States (California)



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