cmac86

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Offline (the 01/29/2016 at 9:10am)

cmac86

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 31921
  • Number of comments : 1525
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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cmac86's page activity

Visits<b>Muskrat777</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 9:04am<b>raven83</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 8:01pm<b>Joshawott14</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 8:18pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 5:18am<b>Rababco</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 2:42pm<b>tisvana18</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 12:03pm<b>BananEnigma</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 6:03pm<b>nopenopenopeneva</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 12:07am<b>BlackHawkSavior</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 9:25pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 7:42am<b>murr52727</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 5:31pm<b>FujisakiChihiro</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 11:27pm<b>silkyred</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 10:39pm<b>Kilgore_Trout</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 11:57pm<b>Vegan_Cannibal</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 11:12am<b>bananajoe666</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:06pm<b>yourmomshotfirst</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:11pm<b>JohntheDeadlock</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 8:43am

Fucked!<b>Vegan_Cannibal</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 5:12pm<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 8:14am<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 11:22pm<b>16bees</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 4:13pm<b>Melharr</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 8:26pm<b>pitbull3k</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 11:13am

cmac86's FML badges

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I like your style

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cmac86's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

by ashamed / 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2014 at 4:47pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm / Ghana (Greater Accra) / Animals

Today, I got a call about a job interview, saying I was hired. I was ecstatic, until they called me back and said they'd called the wrong applicant. They called again later, saying there'd been a mistake and I really was hired. When I went in to confirm it, they said they'd never heard of me. FML

by almost governmental / 09/05/2014 at 6:02pm / United Kingdom (Peterborough) / Work

Today, I tried to pull the old "bucket of water above the door" prank on my brother, but the bucket didn't fall when he opened the door. He noticed it, took it down, then pinned me to the floor and waterboarded me with the ice-cold water. FML

by Anonymous / 09/05/2014 at 5:37pm / Sweden (Vasterbottens Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's been 10 days since my family and I have been visiting France. I've always wanted to try their culinary specialties but my dad says we "can't trust them". We've eaten at McDonald's 9/10 times. FML

by theshire / 08/12/2014 at 2:23am / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Health

Today, I confided to my grandma that I'm suffering from depression and I feel like a burden to everyone. She replied that her grandpa used to suffer from depression too, but that he'd cured himself in the end, namely by committing suicide. Thanks, grandma, thanks. FML

by lacieQ / 08/01/2014 at 4:09pm / Canada / Health

Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML

by Emliy / 08/01/2014 at 1:06am / United States (Illinois) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, there are people working in my bathroom. I have the shits. The only place I could think to go was in my cats litter box. I've used it twice and am now contemplating using it a third time. FML

by shewhopoopsinlitterboxes / 07/25/2014 at 11:54am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

by great 1st impression / 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Miscellaneous

Today, five minutes before closing, a woman came in to buy over $300 worth of clothing from the sales rack. My manager and I had to ring it all up, de-sensor it, fold it, bag it, etc. After it was all rung up, her credit card was declined. FML

by IntoTheClouds / 05/22/2014 at 10:32pm / United States (Vermont) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after my bosses excitedly told me I'm getting promoted to customer service at our grocery store, a customer called me an idiot in the parking lot for accidentally backing into the shopping cart she left in my blind spot. And so it begins. FML

by Helpful Smile / 05/20/2014 at 7:50pm / United States (Iowa) / Work

Today, while driving out to the countryside with my new boyfriend, we came across a deer lying in the road. It seemed badly hurt, but instead of letting me get out and make sure, my boyfriend decided to just run over its head to finish it off, then continued driving with a smirk on his face. FML

by dating a big bag of dicks / 05/13/2014 at 5:02pm / United States / Animals

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

by kids / 05/12/2014 at 1:17am / Kids

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

by STOP / 05/08/2014 at 9:55am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love