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cmac86

Offline (the 07/01/2015 at 9:08am) | Search for a member

cmac86

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 26547
  • Number of comments : 1516
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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cmac86's page activity

Visits<b>hfudge</b> - 13 hours ago<b>cabub007</b> - 17 hours ago<b>facelick</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 1:57pm<b>soulcrusher11</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 4:30am<b>Umbreon_Princess</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 2:07am<b>futureot1</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 11:34am<b>slippy327</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 6:22am<b>Kidjazzin</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 5:59pm<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 7:04am<b>SweetSociopathy</b> - the 06/17/2015 at 9:48pm<b>klutz44</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 9:27pm<b>Steephx0</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 3:54am<b>j_mitchell25</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 3:34am<b>SilverMaster02</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 7:55pm<b>Jackek</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 8:37am<b>izkiz</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 3:28pm<b>rylaii</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 9:27am<b>khloelpcn</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 8:26am

Fucked!<b>Melharr</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 8:26pm<b>pitbull3k</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 11:13am

cmac86's FML badges

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I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of cmac86's badges

cmac86's favorite FMLs

Today, I babysat an 11 year old kid while his parents ate out. As soon as they left, the kid asked me if I wanted to be on the sex offender's list. Before I could even process that, he told me to stay out of his way and he wouldn't accuse me of anything. FML

#21341483
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36551) - you deserved it (2372)

On 01/21/2015 at 6:57am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, thinking he was being so hilarious, my friend slipped me enough laxatives to make a horse shit its intestines out. I haven't been able to move from the toilet for over an hour. FML

#21341346
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31973) - you deserved it (2640)

On 01/20/2015 at 11:29pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I met my boyfriend's best friend. She was a girl he's known for years, and I respected that. She was sweet, until my boyfriend went to the bathroom and she threatened to stab me if I don't leave him. He doesn't believe me, and accused me of having serious jealousy issues. FML

#21340122
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37101) - you deserved it (2402)

On 01/19/2015 at 8:35am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, I needed to take a dump at school. As soon as I sat down, somebody else walked in. I'm extremely poop-shy, so I was forced to wait for several minutes while they styled their hair and applied makeup. After they left, I breathed a sigh of relief. Then someone else walked in. FML

#21318557
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29940) - you deserved it (6988)

On 12/16/2014 at 2:26pm - misc - by privatebathroomneeded - United States (California)

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, things got intimate and we ended up having sex. After he came, he chuckled to himself and said, "That one's for you, Nan". FML

Today, my mom told me how lucky I was to inherit her "asymptomatic" periods. It's true, I don't get cramps, bloating or mood swings with my periods. Nope, just excruciatingly painful diarrhea. Thanks, mom. FML

#21318154
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30451) - you deserved it (2520)

On 12/15/2014 at 8:23pm - misc - by period_probs (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my parents decided to finally kick me out of the house because they've gotten tired of seeing me "sleep around all day and being so lazy" whenever I'm home. I'm currently triple-shifting for 6 days a week. FML

#21317150
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33844) - you deserved it (2637)

On 12/14/2014 at 2:50am - work - by wallamanut (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32800) - you deserved it (2537)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

#21315694
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35588) - you deserved it (4297)

On 12/11/2014 at 4:47pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31875) - you deserved it (18297)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, I got a call about a job interview, saying I was hired. I was ecstatic, until they called me back and said they'd called the wrong applicant. They called again later, saying there'd been a mistake and I really was hired. When I went in to confirm it, they said they'd never heard of me. FML

#21252552
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46442) - you deserved it (2511)

On 09/05/2014 at 6:02pm - work - by almost governmental (woman) - United Kingdom (Peterborough)

Today, I tried to pull the old "bucket of water above the door" prank on my brother, but the bucket didn't fall when he opened the door. He noticed it, took it down, then pinned me to the floor and waterboarded me with the ice-cold water. FML

#21252533
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15665) - you deserved it (36245)

On 09/05/2014 at 5:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vasterbottens Lan)

Today, it's been 10 days since my family and I have been visiting France. I've always wanted to try their culinary specialties but my dad says we "can't trust them". We've eaten at McDonald's 9/10 times. FML

#21235566
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44656) - you deserved it (3752)

On 08/12/2014 at 2:23am - health - by theshire - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I confided to my grandma that I'm suffering from depression and I feel like a burden to everyone. She replied that her grandpa used to suffer from depression too, but that he'd cured himself in the end, namely by committing suicide. Thanks, grandma, thanks. FML

#21226890
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41643) - you deserved it (3920)

On 08/01/2014 at 4:09pm - health - by lacieQ (woman) - Canada



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