Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

cmac86

Offline (the 08/24/2015 at 10:24am) | Search for a member

cmac86

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 27661
  • Number of comments : 1522
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

cmac86's page activity

Visits<b>hplover32</b> - 16 hours ago<b>mylifesucks7757</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 1:01pm<b>Strajee</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 1:49am<b>UncleHoodie</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 4:31pm<b>addisonrose12</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 10:47am<b>lemonadestand</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 5:55am<b>ariasmake1</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 5:51am<b>andrew130</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 3:17am<b>johnny29</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 2:56am<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 7:33am<b>rabbi1010</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 4:49pm<b>theycallmevanny</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 12:25am<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 5:22pm<b>Dowbo</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 10:44pm<b>Unused_Account13</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 7:30pm<b>jonathan7777</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 11:21pm<b>taylorzgoines</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 2:13pm<b>Nicky816</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 1:15am

Fucked!<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 11:22pm<b>16bees</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 4:13pm<b>Melharr</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 8:26pm<b>pitbull3k</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 11:13am

cmac86's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of cmac86's badges

cmac86's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally decided to get a dog. I have always been wanting to get one ever since I was a child. I bought a $1,400 Golden Retriever. I went out for lunch a few hours later with a friend, so I left my dog in the backyard. I came back home to a broken fence and no dog. FML

#909263
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24604) - you deserved it (60397)

On 04/10/2009 at 11:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went out to eat with some friends. They picked a table that wasn't big enough for all of us. I had to sit in the booth behind them. Alone. FML

#904638
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72230) - you deserved it (4497)

On 04/10/2009 at 5:39pm - misc - by yum. - United States (Illinois)

Today, brand new cocktail dress: $300. Matching peep toe heels: $100. Getting my hair done at the salon: $80. Treating myself to a mani/pedi: $50. When finally meeting the guy I have been chatting online with for 2 months, I find out he's my cousin: priceless. FML

Today, I went for a lunch interview for my dream job. The interview was great and at the end, I tried to seal the deal by complimenting my future boss. I said, "You're really hardworking. Do you always work on a Saturday?" He looked at me, smiled and then wrote something down. Today's Friday. FML

#897398
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13194) - you deserved it (54739)

On 04/10/2009 at 3:06am - work - by sifa (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I was sitting shotgun in the car. A huge bug came inside, and everyone began to freak out so naturally I began to swat at it. I got the fly, but I also cracked the windshield. I paid $229 to kill a bug. FML

#881818
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36303) - you deserved it (22303)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:40am - animals - by ferrarismyname (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got all my co-workers motivated. We were all going to quit and walk out the door. I went first. I gave an emotional speech to my boss and threw my uniform to the ground. Then I turned around to to see the rest follow, they all began laughing. They didn't. They WANTED me to quit. FML

#877150
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50990) - you deserved it (33684)

On 04/08/2009 at 8:34pm - work - by ineedanewjob (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I saw a letter from Geneseo that invited me to apply to the honors college. Excited, I wrote the required two page essay on how I am organized. I then saw the strict deadline was March 15th. My little brother thought it would be funny to hide my mail. For the past seven weeks. FML

#869679
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75107) - you deserved it (2899)

On 04/08/2009 at 11:53am - misc - by daremetobecooler - United States (New York)

Today, I met a guy online. We talked all night long and hit it off amazingly. He told me he'd never felt that way about anyone else, and I agreed. He sent me a picture and he was gorgeous. I sent him one after he assured me he didn't care what I looked like. I haven't heard from him since. FML

#867066
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67856) - you deserved it (11250)

On 04/08/2009 at 3:19am - love - by DL06 (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my mom asked me to look through old VHS tapes to throw away, I found one that said "Ashley's kindergarten Play-'95", I put the tape in, it begins to play, only to see "Days of our lives", "Melrose Place", and "ER". My childhood memories are ranked lower than tv shows. FML

#863008
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56974) - you deserved it (3382)

On 04/07/2009 at 10:53pm - love - by 4gottenmemories (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML

#843065
704 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37887) - you deserved it (510328)

On 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm - misc - by blovesg (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
944 comments

I agree, your life sucks (374511) - you deserved it (42466)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was going on a dinner date with a girl I had just met. After I picked her up I asked her if she would like to get lobster. She looked at me and asked if those were the red ones. Confused I nodded. She replied, "Sorry, I don't eat red meat." I laughed. She was serious. FML

#834791
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63096) - you deserved it (5620)

On 04/06/2009 at 1:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at IKEA with my parents. I walked away from them and later I heard the speaker of the store call my name asking me to come to the playground because my mom and dad were worried. I'm 18. FML

#832859
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69484) - you deserved it (4562)

On 04/06/2009 at 10:12am - misc - by BrilsmurfO_O (man) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I had to give a speech on abstinence to a bunch of teenage boys, and surprisingly they were paying attention. After they left, I went to the bathroom and saw I had missed a few buttons on my blouse. The boys had a close up view of my cleavage for 3 hours. FML

#831890
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21221) - you deserved it (59306)

On 04/06/2009 at 6:41am - misc - by Anna (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at a symposium at which my colleague was a co-chair. She and a new acquaintance asked me how it was going. I joked that the discussant's only job at this conference was to be an asshole. The acquaintance was the symposium's discussant. The topic was Rude Behavior at Work. FML

#830404
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7842) - you deserved it (55794)

On 04/06/2009 at 2:14am - work - by singingseattlite (man) - United States (Connecticut)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: