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cmac86

Offline (the 12/17/2014 at 8:35am) | Search for a member

cmac86

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 21018
  • Number of comments : 1479
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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cmac86's page activity

Visits<b>CurtisGirl</b> - 17 hours ago<b>pitbull3k</b> - yesterday at 5:12am<b>Azail</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 4:18am<b>Laylette</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 4:53pm<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 3:57pm<b>Xobubblyxo</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 9:20am<b>mommy2cassidy</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 4:50am<b>gkhalil98</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 5:08pm<b>americanafrican</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 10:33am<b>thedoerofgood</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 4:20pm<b>Door_Productions</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 8:55am<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 7:14am<b>imapartypooper</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 5:39am<b>Briaangel12</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 11:44pm<b>trevmi99</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 10:27pm<b>adamant84</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 10:22am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 2:38pm<b>DefiantGirl</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 3:44pm

Liked!<b>pitbull3k</b> - yesterday at 11:13am

cmac86's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of cmac86's badges

cmac86's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a spider in my bathtub, so instead of killing it, i decided to bring my dog inside the bathroom to kill the spider for me. Turns out that the spider was a black widow, and my dog was bit. The dog killed the spider. The spider killed my dog. FML

#674037
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79288) - you deserved it (164087)

On 03/29/2009 at 1:04am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was on a first date with a girl at the movies. Trying to be polite, I held in a fart until an intense, loud action scene came on. As soon as I let go, the scene went silent and my fart was clearly heard to everyone in the movie theatre. My date went to the bathroom. She didn't come back. FML

#662645
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27602) - you deserved it (77562)

On 03/28/2009 at 2:50pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, for my girlfriend's birthday, I got her an external hard drive and my grandmother's engagement ring. When she opened both boxes, I took her hand and looked deep in her eyes and told her to pick whichever she wanted. She took the external hard drive, even though she already has one. FML

#657715
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67393) - you deserved it (12942)

On 03/28/2009 at 4:07am - love - by Anon. (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, for my girlfriend's birthday, I got her an external hard drive and my grandmother's engagement ring. When she opened both boxes, I took her hand and looked deep in her eyes and told her to pick whichever she wanted. She took the external hard drive, even though she already has one. FML

#657715
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67393) - you deserved it (12942)

On 03/28/2009 at 4:07am - love - by Anon. (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, me and my friend decided to spy on my crush. He lives across the street, so we climbed on the roof of my house and watched him with binoculars. He was working out, and after 5 minutes he started writing something. He put a piece of paper against the window and it said, 'Stop watching me.' FML

#650213
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14942) - you deserved it (134906)

On 03/27/2009 at 8:24pm - misc - by Creep (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was going to a stoplight party. Green shirt=single, yellow=hard to get and red=taken. I show up wearing a red shirt and I see my boyfriend in a green shirt. Thinking it was a mistake, I ask him jokingly why he isn't wearing red. He looks at me weird and says, "Oh, you didn't get my text?" FML

#642666
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101920) - you deserved it (5232)

On 03/27/2009 at 12:47pm - misc - by 1234567898765432 - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, whilst my parents and I were out, my older brother thought it would be funny to play porn on my computer. At full volume. With my window wide open. Now my next-door neighbors tell their kids I'm a spawn of Satan, and the weird guy from across the street winks at me. FML

#641571
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52955) - you deserved it (6886)

On 03/27/2009 at 11:18am - misc - by Spawn_of_Satan (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, I was going down on my girlfriend when I noticed a hickey near her hip. I said, "wow, last night was crazy, I don't even remember doing that!". Without even interrupting the action, she simply said, "You didn't". FML

#640926
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95143) - you deserved it (6174)

On 03/27/2009 at 10:13am - intimacy - by tehhotness (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was feeling sick and having trouble breathing easily. I decided to take a nap and apparently ended up sleeping with my mouth wide open since breathing was an issue. I woke up to my boyfriend trying to put his penis in my mouth. FML

#632473
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (169886) - you deserved it (34177)

On 03/26/2009 at 9:45pm - intimacy - by coughandcold (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my parents were helping me construct my bed. We ended up not having enough screws to properly secure the frame. My dad mentioned that it might cause problems if I got a girl into my bed. My mom said, "Don't worry about it, we all know that's not going to happen." FML

#622257
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95648) - you deserved it (8316)

On 03/26/2009 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by ThanksMom (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I texted this girl that I really like. I got a message back saying "Your message to 903-***-**** could not go through due to a disconnection, thanks, Alltel services." I overheard her later at lunch saying she sent the message, and laughed with her friends about it. FML

#619804
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59139) - you deserved it (9320)

On 03/26/2009 at 10:54am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex and I was on top. I was really into it and in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said "oh, look at the time, I gotta get home". She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

#618347
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84769) - you deserved it (16087)

On 03/26/2009 at 4:37am - intimacy - by crap (man) - Thailand (Krung Thep)



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