cmac86

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Offline (the 01/29/2016 at 9:10am)

cmac86

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 34858
  • Number of comments : 1525
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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cmac86's page activity

Visits<b>CREA</b> - the 11/19/2016 at 9:12pm<b>RectumRecker</b> - the 11/10/2016 at 4:33pm<b>142857</b> - the 10/12/2016 at 2:38pm<b>LiquidGoldRose</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 6:35am<b>28actress</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 6:41am<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 11:29am<b>Aerosmith71</b> - the 08/30/2016 at 7:25pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 12:53pm<b>christophbak</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 6:18am<b>Snip_Snap</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 3:13am<b>queen_jae614</b> - the 06/29/2016 at 2:13am<b>Muskrat777</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 9:04am<b>raven83</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 8:01pm<b>Joshawott14</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 8:18pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 5:18am<b>tisvana18</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 12:03pm<b>BananEnigma</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 6:03pm<b>nopenopenopeneva</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 12:07am

Fucked!<b>Vegan_Cannibal</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 5:12pm<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 8:14am<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 11:22pm<b>16bees</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 4:13pm<b>Melharr</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 8:26pm<b>pitbull3k</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 11:13am

cmac86's FML badges

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I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of cmac86's badges

cmac86's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend dumped me after I told her I found out I have diabetes. She thought it was an STD and I had cheated on her. So I explained what it really was and she dumped me again because she didn't want her future children to inherit my fucked up DNA. FML

by Guy / 09/28/2015 at 2:49pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Miscellaneous

Today, a 60 year old veteran hit on me by pointing to his white hair and saying: "Just because there's snow on the roof doesn't mean there isn't a fire down below." Then he told me vets eat free at Cracker Barrel. FML

by Bex98 / 09/28/2015 at 12:31pm / United States (California) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a customer approached me, smiling and asked what kind of cheese was in our cheddar cheese balls. Thinking he was joking, I laughed and said "swiss." He ordered, found they were indeed cheddar cheese, and reported me. FML

by bandaidstations / 08/16/2015 at 11:33pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, at a quiet restaurant, my stepdad loudly told me he hopes in the future they have "hover caskets" so he doesn't have to carry my "fat ass" to the grave. All because I didn't want a side salad. FML

by jarkleflob / 08/16/2015 at 1:49pm / United States (California) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to fire an employee due to his staggering incompetence. The moment I said the F-word, he started fake-coughing, then loudly humming, then went to his desk and pretended not to hear anything I was saying. It took 3 of us to drag him out of the building kicking and screaming. FML

by bruised / 08/15/2015 at 11:47am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, it's been 2 days since my boyfriend "accidentally" slipped into the wrong hole while continuing to hammer me at full speed. I still can't poop or even walk right. FML

by Anonymous / 08/15/2015 at 5:32am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, at my grandmother's funeral, my senile grandfather kept asking me "Where's granny? I've been looking for her, but I can't find her." FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2015 at 11:08am / Denmark / Miscellaneous

Today, my hateful mother-in-law showed up unexpectedly. I faked taking a phone call so the bitter old hag would leave me alone. She then pulled out her phone, called my number, and glared at me as my phone rang against my ear. FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2015 at 12:47am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, tears and 3 hours on the toilet have made me reevaluate my desire for new culinary experiences. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2015 at 6:59am / United Kingdom / Health

Today, my dad stood by and nodded in agreement as my sister told me that my clinical depression is "getting REALLY old." FML

by Anonymous / 05/27/2015 at 9:39am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Health

Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML

by homo fuckofftus / 05/22/2015 at 1:10pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I kept hearing a child creepily giggling in my living room. I couldn't sleep and got so scared that I started considering hiring an exorcist. Long story short: be careful if you have Bluetooth speakers, because your dickhead neighbor might hack them and start fucking with you. FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2015 at 1:42pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, after recently getting my car fully serviced and fixed, the horn has decided to spontaneously beep. To stop the beeping I have to press the horn hard, making it look like I'm purposely doing it to piss people off. FML

Today, I was sitting in McDonald's. A lady came up to me and started complaining about the bad service, and asked for the manager. I told her that I didn't work there. "But you must, someone that fat has to work here!" FML

by fatty / 04/28/2015 at 9:36pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom told me that if I wanted to commit suicide, I should make it seem like a car accident, and not do it in the house, because she would be too embarrassed if people thought she was a bad parent. FML

by WasNotAdopted / 04/28/2015 at 9:26am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous