Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

clusterfungus

Search for a member

clusterfungus

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 26 January 1977 (37 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 716
  • Number of comments : 63
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About clusterfungus : some fungis have all the luck

clusterfungus's page activity

Visits<b>lexxiii</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 7:58am<b>Eivana</b> - the 05/17/2013 at 11:49pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:31pm<b>CoachLlama</b> - the 10/18/2010 at 7:53am<b>GiRDEELU</b> - the 05/25/2010 at 9:14pm<b>GreekGoddessGirl</b> - the 05/25/2010 at 2:15pm<b>kaytiebobaytie</b> - the 01/29/2010 at 1:34pm<b>hahaDevon</b> - the 01/18/2010 at 9:58pm<b>ha</b> - the 01/15/2010 at 2:57pm

clusterfungus's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

clusterfungus's favorite FMLs

Today, Santa ran over my foot with a Segway. FML

#18435117
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22188) - you deserved it (2561)

On 12/05/2011 at 8:21am - misc - by areyouserial - United States

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35847) - you deserved it (18850)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, I went into a haunted house. Around 30 seconds into the adventure, I couldn't stop screaming at the top of my lungs from all of the scares. Suddenly, the little girl ahead of me, who was all by herself, turned around and told me to "suck it up and grow a pair, loser." FML

#13678660
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9589) - you deserved it (37108)

On 11/01/2010 at 7:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I mentioned to my dad (we have a close relationship) that my last condom had expired. Happy to buy me new ones for the sake of safe sex, he asked me "Do you need small, or extra small?" FML

#12694516
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31314) - you deserved it (20854)

On 08/23/2010 at 1:05am - intimacy - by diesel444 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45704) - you deserved it (14565)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I learned that I was conceived on a public bus. FML

#12573774
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39477) - you deserved it (4373)

On 08/17/2010 at 12:28am - intimacy - by ew. - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend woke up wheezing terribly, aching, and sneezing. He's allergic to cats. I have 2 and they are my babies. He gave me an ultimatum, him or the cats. I haven't figured out how I'm going to tell him that I choose the cats. FML

#11892706
449 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18872) - you deserved it (60044)

On 07/15/2010 at 2:53am - love - by BambooLove (woman) - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML

#7339757
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27227) - you deserved it (4926)

On 01/14/2010 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by scubai (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was watching Free Willy with my boyfriend. It was at the part where the boy leaned into the water to give Willy a hug. I asked, "How do you even hug a whale?" My boyfriend rolled over and gave me a hug, and said, "Like this." FML

#7165792
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35726) - you deserved it (12793)

On 01/05/2010 at 5:03pm - love - by leigh2812 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was sitting on my boyfriends lap and we were hanging out, talking, and enjoying each other's company. Then he looked into my eyes and right when I thought he was going to kiss me, he said "I can feel your heartbeat on my dick." FML

#5136668
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20533) - you deserved it (4195)

On 09/08/2009 at 9:26pm - intimacy - by awkwardbf (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML

#3971516
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50999) - you deserved it (3915)

On 07/23/2009 at 3:10am - kids - by bbbkingsey (man) - United States (Florida)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: