Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

cloudiarose

Offline (the 07/26/2014 at 9:04pm) | Search for a member

cloudiarose

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 27 May 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 582
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

cloudiarose's page activity

Visits<b>nothemother</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 11:20am<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 6:20pm<b>Decky_Bar</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 8:04am<b>EllaJSwiftie</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 3:40am<b>Padreschargers7</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 3:22am<b>CloudEnvy</b> - the 10/17/2011 at 3:02pm

cloudiarose's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of cloudiarose's badges

cloudiarose's favorite FMLs

Today, since I was taking a dump in my wife's parents' house, I lit a candle so that it wouldn't stink. While still sitting down, I went to blow it out and apparently, no matter how strong of a man you are, you will still scream like a little girl if hot wax falls on your penis. FML

#17981787
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32840) - you deserved it (10771)

On 10/14/2011 at 11:23am - intimacy - by cduran2011 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to the free clinic down the street to prove to my girlfriend I don't have any STDs so that we can finally have sex. Turns out I have one. FML

#17979790
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17975) - you deserved it (49169)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:30am - intimacy - by happybudiess - United States

Today, after getting dumped by my boyfriend, I tried to find comfort in one of my closest friends. He embraced me while I struggled against tears, and after a few moments of silence said, "Hey, you know what? I would fuck you anytime. Anytime." FML

#17973250
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32937) - you deserved it (9111)

On 10/13/2011 at 3:19am - intimacy - by scewable (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML

#17853519
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34812) - you deserved it (2778)

On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

#17852902
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25576) - you deserved it (7784)

On 09/28/2011 at 12:55am - intimacy - by confused (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend still couldn't work out where my clitoris is. It's RIGHT THERE, you idiot. I've pointed it out, but each time it's like he needs a compass and a map or something. FML

#17847323
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34506) - you deserved it (11530)

On 09/27/2011 at 11:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my boyfriend still couldn't work out where my clitoris is. It's RIGHT THERE, you idiot. I've pointed it out, but each time it's like he needs a compass and a map or something. FML

#17847323
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34506) - you deserved it (11530)

On 09/27/2011 at 11:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML

#17818557
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42793) - you deserved it (4359)

On 09/24/2011 at 3:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML

#17818557
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42793) - you deserved it (4359)

On 09/24/2011 at 3:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML

#17818557
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42793) - you deserved it (4359)

On 09/24/2011 at 3:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML

#17818557
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42793) - you deserved it (4359)

On 09/24/2011 at 3:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, desperate for my boyfriend to notice me for once, I started noisily masturbating while he was playing World of Warcraft. His response was to put his headphones on. FML

#17811635
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38185) - you deserved it (11321)

On 09/23/2011 at 6:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mother said I am slipping too deep into depression since my boyfriend left for college in Fresno. Her solution: buying me a vibrator. FML

#17810951
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26540) - you deserved it (6767)

On 09/23/2011 at 2:16am - intimacy - by kdmoney - United States (California)

Today, I caught my wife slipping penis enlargement pills into my coffee. FML

#17795601
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44965) - you deserved it (8121)

On 09/21/2011 at 1:20pm - intimacy - by ThisBlows (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I realized my tampon goes deeper than my boyfriend. FML

#17786255
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50666) - you deserved it (6077)

On 09/20/2011 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Cantgetno (woman) - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: