clojo1112

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clojo1112

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8052
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About clojo1112 : Hi my name is Chloe :)

clojo1112's page activity

Visits<b>AnnaMuffin</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 10:06am<b>muhahahaa</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 7:14pm<b>keepmelikeanoath</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 9:49am<b>Chibster</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 7:33am<b>random2212</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 10:47pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 11:49am<b>Pokefinch27</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 12:41am<b>completenonsense</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 7:00pm<b>bre88</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 2:30pm<b>madi10647</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 9:59pm<b>mad_mcdonald</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 2:13pm<b>sallysali9</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 5:06pm<b>stormrunner987</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 9:30am<b>angelnursery</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 12:19am<b>alexwagner21</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 2:30pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 3:02am<b>maddymarie123</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 10:06pm<b>PerfectDude</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 11:21am

Fucked!<b>allred1997</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 8:26am<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 11:24pm

clojo1112's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

clojo1112's favorite FMLs

Today, I ordered food at McDonald's. I'm on crutches, and a guy offered to carry my tray to the table. He rushed out with my food. FML

by myownperson / 10/25/2011 at 4:17am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML

by KaySchrages92 / 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, without telling me, my mom dropped me off at my grandmother's house, and drove off. Now I'm supposed to spend the next month with her. Guess she forgot my grandma died six weeks ago. FML

by lonely / 10/24/2011 at 10:55am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got into a pretty heated argument with my boss. On my way out the door I told him he would be lucky if I came back to work. Unfortunately, I left the interior light on in my truck and it drained the battery. I had to go back in and ask for a jump. FML

by bob / 10/22/2011 at 12:55am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML

by Virginiedetibo / 10/21/2011 at 10:09pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After we finished, he went under the covers and started touching me. At first I thought he was trying to give me "oral pleasure". It turns out he lost the condom inside of me and was trying to fish it out before I noticed. FML

Today, I came home crying and informed my mother that someone had called me a 'fat bitch' today. She held me at arms length, looked me straight in the eyes, and lovingly said, "You can't change who you are." FML

by Anonymous / 10/20/2011 at 12:16pm / Ireland (Meath) / Miscellaneous

Today, this weird girl started texting me. I really didn't want to talk to her, so I texted back, "This message could not be delivered because of a temporery network setup error. Error 2128-226110." She replied, "You spelt temporary wrong." FML

by tommyboy783 / 10/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the store to pick up some tampons. After waiting in line for about 10 minutes, the male cashier looked at me when I was leaving and said, "Have a nice... week!" FML

by sarah / 10/19/2011 at 3:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

by lolilovemyboyfriend / 10/19/2011 at 10:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, my best friend who I have known for ten years recommended I didn't continue a relationship with my girlfriend. I thought she wanted to go out with me which I was hoping for, for a long time. Turns out she wanted to go out with her. FML

by anonymous / 10/19/2011 at 8:19am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, I went out shopping. When I left the store, I saw my ex, who I'm still crazy about. He helped me carry my bags out to the car. When I leaned in to give him a hug goodbye, he stepped aside, and I fell face-first into a puddle. He walked away laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2011 at 3:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

by Mini-wanker / 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years felt comfortable enough with me to disclose that he had previously spent 4 years in a mental institute because he tried to kill his mother. He also told me we will be together forever. I'm scared. FML

by bubba / 10/17/2011 at 6:02am / China / Love

Today, I was in a public restroom. The guy in the urinal next to me was making loud sounds of discomfort. I ignored him and finished up. I turned around to be greeted by his red swollen beehive of a crotch, and him asking, "Is my penis supposed to look like this?" FML

by blarp / 10/17/2011 at 12:20am / United States (New Jersey) / Health