clojo1112

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clojo1112

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7297
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About clojo1112 : Hi my name is Chloe :)

clojo1112's page activity

Visits<b>madi10647</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 9:59pm<b>mad_mcdonald</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 2:13pm<b>sallysali9</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 5:06pm<b>stormrunner987</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 9:30am<b>angelnursery</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 12:19am<b>alexwagner21</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 2:30pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 3:02am<b>maddymarie123</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 10:06pm<b>PerfectDude</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 11:21am<b>xlasxtchanxce13</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 5:14pm<b>Allusivness</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 9:38pm<b>earlytermination</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 2:19pm<b>Mexico_WC2018</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 5:42am<b>TEZZ</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 12:43pm<b>allred1997</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 2:26am<b>memed</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 5:23pm<b>Samjit</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 6:37am<b>cpullin2390</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 9:06pm

Fucked!<b>allred1997</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 8:26am<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 11:24pm

clojo1112's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

clojo1112's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2011 at 7:55am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I got mugged by a guy who was threatening me with a stapler. FML

by StaplerScared / 11/08/2011 at 9:39am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML

by lunarstrain / 11/08/2011 at 1:11am / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend has a new obsession: grabbing my junk and whispering in my ear the song, "Baby, Imma Be Your Motivation." Problem? I get an instant boner and she only does it in public, because it's "funny as hell." FML

by InstantHardOn / 11/07/2011 at 11:43pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML

by Dlord357 / 11/07/2011 at 9:24am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML

by bakedplum / 11/01/2011 at 1:52pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, on a dating site, I was matched with my brother, again. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

by ifeeldirty / 10/27/2011 at 8:22am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I saw my upstairs neighbor outside getting the mail. She asked how my day was, and then apologized that the sound of her baby's crying through the walls kept me up last night. Apparently she heard me when I yelled at 2am for her fucking demon spawn to shut up. FML

by Deborah / 10/27/2011 at 2:41am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at work when I found an iPhone on the floor. I decided not to turn it into the manager and keep it. Five minutes later, a customer asked if anyone had turned in her missing phone. I said no and began to walk away, when her friend called her phone. It rang. She recognized the ringtone. FML

by charlie3289 / 10/27/2011 at 1:01am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, while dancing at my studio, our instructor was giving us all characters opposite of ourselves to portray in an improv solo. My friends got cool things like "creepy" and "vulnerable". I got "extremely sexy". FML

by apparentlyunsexy / 10/27/2011 at 12:00am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML

by Anonymous / 10/26/2011 at 7:44pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I decided to be a generous guy and slip a dollar from my pocket to a beggar. Turns out I'd slipped my hard-earned $100 bill instead. FML

by Pimaan / 10/26/2011 at 12:14pm / United States / Money

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be a good idea to viciously rip off my thong. My ass crack is numb. FML

by beccav23 / 10/25/2011 at 12:08pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my roommates sent a relationship request to my one night stand with my Facebook account. She accepted, and sent me a long message confessing her love for me. I can't remember her. FML

by birgz / 10/25/2011 at 8:42am / Love