chrispatsy28

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Offline (the 08/20/2016 at 9:49pm)

chrispatsy28

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 February 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 438
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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chrispatsy28's page activity

Visits<b>BlueBaronBitch</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 7:06pm

chrispatsy28's FML badges

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

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chrispatsy28's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to create a perfect society in English class; the best society has their grade go up a full letter. After tons of preparation and thinking, I lost to an island made only of cheese. FML

by JPPUDLY / 12/11/2012 at 6:03pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML

by WhyAppleWhy / 09/01/2012 at 7:14pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was at a Chinese buffet, and I got a fortune cookie. I opened it, and it said, "The love of your life is sitting across from you". The only thing across from me was an empty chair. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2012 at 4:13pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I've been in love with for three years. Her response was to well up, start crying, and ask me why I had to have chosen her. FML

by Oraashi / 06/26/2012 at 1:18pm / United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent) / Love

Today, my extremely OCD girlfriend wouldn't have sex with me because my bedroom wasn't "properly symmetrical." FML

by gtfoocd / 12/27/2011 at 10:20am / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy

Today, I learned I was adopted and that my parents had died in a car accident when I was really young. My girlfriend was sitting next to me when I got the news, and several hours later broke up with me in a text stating, "I don't want to be with someone who doesn't have real parents." FML

by losingit / 10/19/2010 at 12:30am / United States (California) / Love

Today, a cat came up to me on the pavement so I petted it a little. An elderly man rode past on his bicycle and shouted "I'd like to stroke your pussy too!" FML

by pussystroker / 11/19/2009 at 12:20pm / United Kingdom (Peterborough) / Intimacy

Today, a cat came up to me on the pavement so I petted it a little. An elderly man rode past on his bicycle and shouted "I'd like to stroke your pussy too!" FML

by pussystroker / 11/19/2009 at 12:20pm / United Kingdom (Peterborough) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my whole family thinks my girlfriend is imaginary. I sent her a text in front of them telling her that. She never responded. FML

by Imaginary girlfriend / 09/21/2009 at 12:16am / Love

Today, I came home early from business trip in Paris, I bought an engagement ring. I was going to take my girlfriend of 2 years out and propose to her. I sneak into my house as a surprise and she's having it off with another man. Now I have a ring that I can only return in France. FML

by theboy6494 / 08/10/2009 at 4:47pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for a while, and I was very excited to tell him the news. When I opened his office planning to surprise him with the news, I saw him making out with a man. FML

by soontobedivorced / 04/19/2009 at 12:05am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I met my boyfriend's family for the first time. I was playing with his little sister by grabbing her arms and spinning her around. On one turn, she started screaming in pain. It turns out I dislocated both her shoulders. FML

by grem / 04/13/2009 at 7:27pm / United States / Kids

Today, my daughter ran up to a librarian working in the kids section and screamed "MOMMY!" and hugged her. She looked at her and said "I'm not your mommy." My daughters reply: "I know. But you're better than mommy" FML

by Windstar / 04/07/2009 at 3:32am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I met my girlfriend's very religious parents for dinner. Somehow we got to talking about her groin hernias that were repaired as a baby. I never knew she had hernias repaired and said, "But she doesn't have any scars down there." There was a long awkward silence. FML

by douchetard / 03/26/2009 at 3:37am / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids