chooka27

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chooka27

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 873
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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chooka27's page activity

Visits<b>skankyourart</b> - the 03/18/2009 at 5:24pm

chooka27's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

chooka27's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard a student in the class I assist having trouble with a download. I walked over and showed him how to save to his flash drive, and how to use 7z to unzip said file. I then found out I'd just assisted him in downloading a half gig of porn during class. FML

by TingBarter / 07/09/2009 at 11:00am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I started my period. I am getting married tomorrow. So, not only am I going to be on my period for my wedding night and honeymoon, my best friend has to help me change my pad because my dress is so big. FML

by anonymous / 04/24/2009 at 3:50pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

by tool / 04/09/2009 at 2:03am / United States (Nevada) / Work

Today, I made the mistake of sneezing in front of a hyper religious customer, who for ten minutes blamed the incident of shifting weather patterns that signaled the return of Jesus, who was as she explained, upset about the abortion rates in America and President Obama. FML

by Anonymous / 04/08/2009 at 6:26am / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I was fired because a patron complained that she didn't like the way I kept staring at her kids. I was a lifeguard. FML

by Lifeguard / 04/04/2009 at 3:03pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. When he told me I had tennis elbow I said "that's funny I don't play tennis". Then he asked me if I had a girlfriend. When I said no he said "Well I guess we solved this one." FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2009 at 12:34am / United States (Georgia) / Health

Today, we sparred for Tae Kwon Do. I forgot my cup, but I didn't think anyone sucked enough to hit me below the belt. 5 seconds into a match, some girl knees me in the happy sacks. After writhing in pain for 30 seconds, I got back up to spar. I didn't think she sucked enough to do it again. She did. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 6:28am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 1:13am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy

Today, my friend was saying how her "nano" died. I quickly responded by saying, "So? Recharge it." Turns out she didn't say "nano"; she'd said "nana." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 12:36am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "what do I do now?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2009 at 1:40am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, whilst working at Subway, I took an order for 6 footlongs. The entire process took 15 minutes due to the customer's hesitant and glacial pace. When it came to paying, he pulled out his wallet, looked inside, looked at me, and walked quickly out of the store. FML

by matte / 03/30/2009 at 8:16am / Australia (South Australia) / Work

Today, I was mowing the lawn of my brand new house, located in a very nice neighborhood (I am a hispanic male), and a lady in her nice white cadillac drove up and asked me, in extremely broken spanish, if I could mow her lawn too. FML

by Michaelichael / 03/28/2009 at 4:17pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to my guy friend about prom. I told him I was turned down by 7 guys. So he said "Well, you could always ask me." I then said "Do you want to go to prom with me?" His response was "Nope...now that's 8!" FML

by rejected / 03/27/2009 at 8:38pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, whilst my parents and I were out, my older brother thought it would be funny to play porn on my computer. At full volume. With my window wide open. Now my next-door neighbors tell their kids I'm a spawn of Satan, and the weird guy from across the street winks at me. FML

by Spawn_of_Satan / 03/27/2009 at 11:18am / Hong Kong / Miscellaneous