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cbennetch

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cbennetch

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  • Number of visits : 520
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cbennetch's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:51pm

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cbennetch's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

#15539670
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46013) - you deserved it (15394)

On 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm - love - by ouch - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
404 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48578) - you deserved it (8004)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after my 22 year old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

#15339337
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41579) - you deserved it (11181)

On 03/16/2011 at 6:05pm - kids - by WTF -

Today, I went snowboarding and fell backwards, hitting my head on a patch of ice. When I got home, I told my brother I thought I might have a concussion. He told me I should be a man and suck it, swiftly smacking my head, causing me to pass out. FML

#15221158
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33589) - you deserved it (3132)

On 03/06/2011 at 7:50pm - health - by milkndstufff (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

#15184059
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37467) - you deserved it (23379)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the dog went nuts at 3am. I searched the yard with a spotlight and machete. Nothing. He may actually just be an asshole. FML

#15184049
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23873) - you deserved it (5629)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:20am - animals - by panda -

Today, I was looking at an old post between my ex and I on Facebook. Everything I was reading was adorable. Just as I was reminiscing about the great relationship we had, I look to the right of the screen to see the girl he cheated on me with in "People you may know". Thanks Facebook. FML

#15098063
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29974) - you deserved it (7362)

On 02/24/2011 at 1:20am - misc - by ruinedmoment (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to sell my phone to pay for the phone bill. FML

#15087655
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19535) - you deserved it (24384)

On 02/23/2011 at 4:18am - money - by suzyyy (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML

#15042917
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49220) - you deserved it (40935)

On 02/19/2011 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized how out of shape I am, when I couldn't finish masturbating because I ran out of breath. FML

#14954867
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15319) - you deserved it (58670)

On 02/13/2011 at 4:01am - intimacy - by RyanM - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML

#14838014
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67981) - you deserved it (6252)

On 02/04/2011 at 9:08am - intimacy - by theish -

Today, as I went into my calculus class, the teacher announced that someone had received a negative grade on the test we were getting back. I laughed and said, "Which f*cker managed to get a negative?" Turns out I'm the dumbass. FML

#14770555
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9071) - you deserved it (53528)

On 01/30/2011 at 4:24am - misc - by terrible kenny - United States (New York)

Today, it's the 3 month anniversary marking the day two friends and I shaved our heads as a show of solidarity for a friend starting chemo. Her prognosis is good and her hair only thinned slightly. We, on the other hand, look like a motley crew of lesbian biker chicks. FML

#14585633
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24973) - you deserved it (9502)

On 01/15/2011 at 2:09am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, an attractive guy told me he wanted to get to know me and see me again. When I told my boyfriend, in hopes of stirring up some jealousy, he said "he'll regret it when he finds out what you're like in bed, trust me." FML

#14282148
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20189) - you deserved it (37775)

On 12/21/2010 at 4:38am - intimacy - by fail (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I realized that the fish-shaped birth mark on the back of my leg, that I have had all my life, is not really shaped like a fish as I had originally thought. It looks just like a penis. FML

#14234557
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27494) - you deserved it (3013)

On 12/17/2010 at 11:23am - health - by BYUwildchild - United States



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