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cartedor

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cartedor

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3242
  • Number of comments : 283
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 4:32pm<b>Thatrand0mguy</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 10:10am<b>BBeffedmylife</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 7:36pm<b>lakeiishaa205</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 4:14pm<b>boredkidlulz</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 12:48pm<b>lazydaysss</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 10:57pm<b>McRxXxMcR</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 8:47pm<b>jaydoug92</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 6:25pm<b>mikester10723</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 6:10am<b>JayDay_123</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 7:54pm<b>DArthurVaderian</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 8:00pm<b>Ashfal</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 10:27pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 10:13pm<b>ohhhhhhhhhyeah</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 1:33am<b>timtamslam</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 6:41am<b>xCommander</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 2:47am<b>zhaterminatah</b> - the 02/03/2013 at 11:34pm<b>Msawsome</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 1:31am

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cartedor's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend dumped me so he could sleep with my mom without feeling guilty. FML

#7304423
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32779) - you deserved it (2842)

On 01/12/2010 at 6:54pm - intimacy - by notasgood (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was wearing a shirt that had a picture of a squirrel and acorns with a caption reading "Protect Your Nuts". My dad walked up to me, read my shirt, then punched me in the balls. FML

#7227808
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10417) - you deserved it (38273)

On 01/09/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by squirrel (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was walking out of Starbucks when I sneezed, causing coffee to burn my nose. I screamed, dropped it, and sent scorching coffee all over my legs while dropping everything else I was holding. FML

#7163475
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23792) - you deserved it (6200)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:58pm - misc - by SplashOuch (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend called my cell. I picked up and said "Hi, this is Lisa and I want you to fuck me raw". It was my dad. He was at my boyfriend's parent's house and forgot his phone. FML

#7097610
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8368) - you deserved it (29322)

On 01/02/2010 at 2:02am - intimacy - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a blind date. When I arrived at our meeting place, I spotted my date, because he was the only one in the bar wearing a nametag. I walked up to him and asked, "Are you John?" He responded, "That depends. Are you Jen?" When I said yes he said, "Then no," and left. FML

#7056556
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34985) - you deserved it (3416)

On 12/31/2009 at 12:33pm - love - by lifesux (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, on the airplane, the kid behind me kicked my seat hundreds of times, while the big bald guy next to me farted deadly ones repeatedly. I was on a non-stop 14-hour flight. FML

#7027797
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31272) - you deserved it (2182)

On 12/30/2009 at 1:27am - misc - by planes - United States (Oregon)

Today, the guy I've had a crush on came over to my house. My Dad came in to see how we we're doing, looks at me and says "Man... You've REALLY been puttin' on the pounds!", pokes me in the stomach a few times, and leaves. FML

#6968150
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29316) - you deserved it (3640)

On 12/27/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Fatty (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I backed out of the driveway of our newly built home. Being unfamiliar with the driveway, I ended up getting bogged in the mud and slid halfway down the steep slope of the front yard, trying free myself. I haven't met my neighbours yet. They stood in their front lawns watching me. FML

#6967912
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18821) - you deserved it (3666)

On 12/27/2009 at 1:58am - misc - by jaded_woman (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend told his parents about my bondage fetish. In front of me. FML

#6952293
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17802) - you deserved it (3178)

On 12/26/2009 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I submitted my application to a restaurant as a server. The manager, who is more than 30 years older than me, said he'd be calling me. He later texted me asking for a date instead of giving me a job. FML

#6894646
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25529) - you deserved it (1901)

On 12/23/2009 at 12:03am - work - by Chris (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28876) - you deserved it (7004)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, at work I was playing football with one of my camp kids in the indoor-pool. I saw a co-worker walking by and I decided to hit him with the football. The football slipped out of my hand and I hit a lady in the face, breaking her nose, and causing her to fall and get a concussion. FML

#6725096
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7837) - you deserved it (32630)

On 12/12/2009 at 5:54pm - misc - by Icci (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me because I was "letting myself go". When I told the little girl I babysit in the afternoons why I was so upset, she looked at me for a moment before saying, "Well, I definitely can't blame him." FML

#6716772
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25112) - you deserved it (7480)

On 12/12/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend on Facebook. She's in the forces, and it was her birthday. I asked her if she liked the flowers I sent her. She thanked me, then asked if she could remove our relationship status. When I asked why, she said, "It's not like we're really going out anymore." FML

#6677615
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33145) - you deserved it (2333)

On 12/09/2009 at 7:31am - love - by im_not_me (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I spent 30 minutes trying to find my glasses. I don't know whats worse, the fact that I was wearing them the whole time, or that my girlfriend played along and helped me look for them. FML

#6594028
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10004) - you deserved it (29504)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by wobbles (man) - United States (California)



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